The breathless fall

Chapter 4

I am the monster parents tell their children about at night

Jotunheim. He was back in Jotunheim. Back where the giants found him after his fall from Asgard. Back to the place where every indignity and torment was thrust upon him, tenfold, for the crime of killing their king and nearly destroying their world.

- Loki whimpers, curled up against the far wall of his cell. The heavy chain around his neck is digging into his shoulders, drawing blood. He can hear the massive footsteps pounding ever closer, and he knows that this will never end. Every day he's taken apart a little more, new wounds and busies mark him as king slayer, betrayer, and whatever evils the Jotuns see fit to call him. Every day he screams and begs for it to stop, but his tormentors' just twist the knife in a little deeper. And every night he is subjugated to his darkest nightmare. His newly grown heart is wrenched from his body and replaced with an abyssal magic ice, called up from the core of Jotunheim itself, so that he may feel the breaking of the world played out in his very flesh. Every second his soul cries out, every moment blinding and agonising, and every time all he can hope for is that it will be too much for him to bear, and he will finally fade into mindless death.

And the door swings open, rough hands pull him to his knees-

"LOKI! Loki, snap out of it!" Stark's frantic voice has pierced his clouded mind. "It's ok, whatever that thing was, it's gone." Stark is holding him close to his chest, cradling him like he was going to fall into pieces. "It's alright, I'm here." Stark murmurs, slowly rubbing his back in circles. He begins to sob, all thoughts on keeping up a pretence are gone, for a moment he just lets go and cries.

He's ashamed of himself, how could he fall apart like this in someone's company? Loki tries to steel his mind, and he takes a few shuddering deep breaths. He can hear Stark breathing loud and slow, and as he presses his head to his chest, he can hear the Iron man's heart pounding quickly. Loki uses this as a focus, listening to Stark's heart drum away, and will's his own heart to keep pace. Gradually he can hear Stark's pulse begin to slow, and for a few moments his heart and Starks are beating in perfect unison. The Iron man is still murmuring sweet words in his ear, and Loki is surprised how for a man born in the theatre of war, how soft and gentle he is proving himself to be.

"Here, drink this." Stark motions, pressing the bowl of melted snow to his lips. He eagerly gulps down a mouthful of the warm water and clears his throat.

Stark looks at him, his eyes full of concern. "Better?"

"Better." Loki mumbles. "Thank you."

"Are you going to tell me what that was about?" Stark asks, his hands on Loki's shoulders.

Loki wants to, yearns to but he cannot. He has never has a companion, not even a proper friend. And even though the enemy- no, the man- in front of him has now saved his life multiple times, he could not trust him. This was too intimate. His body heaves with a great sigh, and he pushed the memories as far away from his wakening mind as he can.

"No." Is all he trusts himself to say. "But we must leave immediately." He wiggles out from under Stark's arms and starts to put on the rest of his clothes.

"Go? I don't even know where we are now. And where is Yodlel-heim anyways?"

"Jotunheim!" Loki snaps at him, wiping the tears from his eyes. He has no patience or the time to deal with Stark's dry humor. "One of the nine realms. We must escape this world quickly, it is... not a world I care to linger on."

"Alright, fine. But I'm not going to last out there without something warmer to wear. My suit is scrap metal." Stark illustrates this point by dangling a frayed arm piece at him.

"Save what you can, for this world has crushed greater men than you. We'll need every advantage if we are to make it out alive." Loki is glad that his voice is no longer wavering, he needs to appear strong. If not to convince Stark, than to at least convince himself. The next move he has to make is particularly difficult, and he does not want the Iron man to see what kind of creature he really is. Loki finished dressing, and he sees that Stark is pulling pieces and wires from his suit and placing them in a pile at his feet. Loki can only guess at their purpose, but if Stark deems them important, they must be of value. Loki begins to gather his magic, feeling it flow from his very bones, up through the muscles in his chest and arms, and settle just under the skin of his hands. He knows the Jotun's are familiar with his magic, and they will hunt him down again whenever he uses it, but this is necessary for his -ally?- Stark's survival.

"Stark. There is a way for you to survive the cold, but you must trust me." And Loki sits there, studying Stark's face for any hint of malice, but what he sees is curiosity. Stark looks down at his hands, and snaps his fingers.

"Magic, right? Just tell me it isn't going to turn me into a reindeer. Only you can pull off the big antler look." He mimics antlers with his hands, forcing a laugh.

Loki is surprised at Stark's continuation with humor, is he trying to cheer him up? Or just uncomfortable speaking with him after his outburst?

"No, but you must face away from me... and close your eyes." He adds the last remark as an afterthought, just to be safe.

"Alright, just remember rule number one, no killing-"

"I will not harm you. Just sit and be quiet."

And Stark does just that. Loki kneels beside him and places one hand on his back, and the other on his forehead and closes his eyes . He stirs up the magic in his hands and tries to attune himself to Stark's presence before him. Loki can feel warmth radiate from Stark's body, akin to stone warmed in the hot sun. His muscles are tight in his back, and Loki wonders if it is from fear or anticipation. He aligns his hand to run parallel to Stark's spine, and feels small bumps under the t-shirt. Scars, three of them, clustered around the left of his spine. Loki begins to murmur ancient words, some out loud and some in his mind. He whispers words of binding and change, and his Jotun magic seeps from his finger tips and anchors into the Iron man's body. Stark flinches, and Loki can feel his brow furrow in a wince, but he doesn't gasp or tell him to stop. Loki continues, and opens a channel from his heart to Stark's, pouring a small piece of his being, his soul into Anthony's body. He moves his magic inside Tony, through his chest, and he can see in his mind's eye the tiny pieces of metal lodged inside his body. He moves past these and burrows the magic into Stark's very bones, where it ripples and changes him from the inside out. Loki can feel Stark grow colder and Loki opens his eyes, just to make sure the spell is working. He looks to Stark's face, and can see a blue tone flush into his skin and blend until he is as dark as a true Jotun. Stark begins to squirm, as the cold magic from Loki works its way down from his neck, though his core, and finally down to the tips of his fingers and toes. Loki removes his hand from Stark's back, and lowers his other hand to cover Stark's eyes.

"Do not move please. It is nearly finished." He whispers in his ear. "Just give it a moment to settle." Loki watches as the blue absorbs back into Stark's skin. When the last piece of his magic has bonded with stark, he carefully closes the channel between them. The effort of changing a mortal form, even temporarily, has weakened him greatly. He ignores the throbbing in his head and the dizziness of expended energy and simply sits down and breathes slowly to regain composure.

"It is finished mortal." He removes his hand from Stark's eyes.

"Huh. That was interesting." Stark says like he's calmly discussing an engine he's rebuilt, instead of his own body. Loki watches as he flexes his fingers and runs his hands over his face. "And weird, it's like everything's tingly. Also, I swear I taste actual peppermint, that's normal right?" He smacks his lips a few times for good measure. "Usually when I plug in my reactor I taste cocoooo-nut." he draws out the last word, and Loki can see him roll his tongue in his mouth.

"Are you fit enough to travel?"

"I guess. Lead the way Merlin."

Loki moves over to the opening and twists his wrists around to call forth his spear.

"I was wondering where you hid that." Stark motions to him, as he bundles the last of the supplies in a foil blanket. Loki clears an opening big enough to crawl through and digs his hands and feet in the snow for a good purchase.

"Catch!" Stark says to him, and throws up the bag. He catches it in one hand, and kneels to clasp Stark's hand to pull him up. He hands the bag back to Stark and takes in their surroundings.

The stillness of the frigid air is intent on smothering his very breath. His heart seems thunderously loud in his ears, and it seems like a pulsing beacon that calls out to the monsters of the dark. Loki clenches his spear in his hand and forces himself to focus on something else, anything else. They needed to get to the core of Jotunheim in the deep abyss, and he tries to contemplate the safest rout. The two of them are standing on a small hill of debris, and before them stretches the cold and dark maze of ice that is Jotunheim. To their right is a towering mountain, its sides bursting with crooked teeth of black ice. It looms over the landscape and casts an imposing shadow over the strutting towers of glaciers beneath it. It would be too perilous a road even under better circumstances, and Loki fears the creatures that hide in the darkest of places of the mountains. He turns his gaze to their left, and he sees a mosaic of broken ice sheets, slowly curving downwards to a cathedral-like tunnel under the surface. Loki can also make out the ruins of a temple of Jotun sunk eons ago, once a towering monstrosity, now just a meager smattering of broken bones covered in a frigid crown of ice and snow. The tunnel will lead them to what he needs, but it will take them right past he ruins he hopes to avoid.

"This way Stark." He motions, and starts off in the direction of the tunnel. "You would be wise to keep a close eye for the Frost giants. They are large and powerful, and do not take kindly to trespassers in their realm." Or King slayers- world breakers- Loki is a plaything under their hands, to twist and cut-

"If they catch us, you will never see you precious earth again." -And his brother, his mother, his home in Asgard are all gone. He calls out but no one will answer him in the dark, he's so desperately alone-

Stark keeps pace at his side."Abandon all hope ye who enter."

Yes, he did abandon hope, and when the Jotuns grew tired of their games they traded him to the Chitauri for-

"An appropriate statement, Stark."

"ya, we'll be fine." He pants. "anything else you want to tell me?"

"just do not wander from my side. The magic I'm using to keep the cold from you will fade if we are separated."

"How does that work exactly?" Stark asks, and Loki can tell his question is genuine.

He ponders for a moment, wondering how much to say. "Always a curious one, aren't you Stark?" he replies, avoiding a direct answer.

Stark slides down particularly steep piece of ice. "You know I'll figure it out eventually."

Loki is sure that he will, after all, he is one of the more brilliant ones in his realm. Instead of replying he trudges a little faster through the knee deep snow. It is dangerous to be exposed on the hills like this, and he knows they must reach the relative safety of then ice sheets. Thankfully there is little moon and fewer stars in the cloudy sky making it a good time to be crossing the fields of snow. Suddenly a large chunk of ice breaks off a spire far ahead of them and plunges through what Loki thought was a solid ice sheet.

"Damn." He curses under his breath.

"I saw that too. We should head for the side near the glacier; it should be more stable there."

Of course it would also bring them through the broken temple, but it was a favorable alternative to falling through the ice. "Agreed."

Loki corrects his course and sees Stark step on a sheet of ice, losing his footing. "Whoa!" He gasps as Loki catches his flailing arm and helps him to his feet. "Uh, Thanks..." He apologises. "My legs are still Kind tingly. It's hard to balance in the snow." Loki snickers quietly, and as he sets the Iron man upright again, he can see a blush of colour on Tony's cheeks.

"Please try to be more careful where you place your feet."

"Will do."

Loki and Stark continue down the wavering and difficult terrain for several hours. Occasionally stopping so Stark can adjust the bag on his back, or Loki to get his bearings. At last they reach the foot of the ice sheets and Loki pauses abruptly. He can sense something painfully close to them. He strains his ears, not willing to use his magic, lest the thing watching them is drawn to it. There! A small whisper just around a corner of black ice. Loki recognises it as the language of the Jotun's, The Frost giants, and his heart stops in his chest. His vision begins to swim and his mouth is agape. No, no! Not so quickly! Please, I want-

Suddenly he hears Stark let out a yep, and before he can turn, –WHAM! - A sliding Stark plows into his knees knocking him on his back. Loki's head smacks on the ice beside the Iron man's own and together they slide into a snow bank. "Sorry I- mpfhhh!" Stark ties to say, But Loki is covering his mouth with his hand. He struggles away, but Loki keeps his hand firm. His heart thundering, Loki strains his ears for any hint that the Frost giants have heard them. Stark moves again, and Loki gives him a venomous look that he hopes will mask his fear. He raises a finger to his own lips and Stark nods in understanding. Letting go of Stark he can hear the voices grow louder and he begins to panic. Stark's face turns to white as he too can hear the voices, and then feel the footsteps pound closer. Loki holds himself deathly still and prepares himself. He clutches the spear in his hand, ready to go down fighting this time and looks to Stark for assurance. But what he sees is the Iron man clutching something small in his hand, and he has no Idea what Stark has planned but he is prepared to follow his lead. Stark raises his eyebrow at Loki as if to say, Ready?

Loki nods slightly, and Stark lobs the device as hard as he can towards the direction of the voices. It whistles through the air and there is a whoomf of a tiny explosion that showers them with snow. A startling flash of light is followed be several smaller pops of sound. Loki hears the Frost giants cry out and squeal in pain. Tony jumps up and pulls him to his feet, and together they run as fast as they can away from the Frost giants and towards the shadow of the sunken temple.

If Loki had known what that temple housed, he never would have led Tony into its depths.

Notes

Authors note:

Horray! Thanks for reading so far, and all of your favorites and follows. It means the world to me that so many people have read this so-far and I'm glad so many of you enjoy it! So lots of hugs all around. And I hope you all enjoy the chapters coming up , (hopefully soon, I'm trying to post at least twice a week now because I have a lot of story lined up. ) I've also tied to keep the writing style separate from Tony to Loki, and I apologise for any confusion with the " He, Him, and His" pronouns. And pay special attention to whenever "Tony" instead of "Stark" is used. Its meant to be more personal for Loki when he mentions him by first name.

Enjoy!

Disclaimer: I do not own any marvel characters or their movie interpretations, I've done this for fun and I hope you enjoy! Also this is set after Iron man 3 and the avengers. Loki escaped to earth and Tony never had romantic feelings for pepper. (Hence the arc reactor is still in his chest)