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Can't Handle This

Chapter 15

“Bruce,” Tony said as he looked down CJ's throat. “Can you pass me a bottle of chlorine concentrate?”

“Huh?!” CJ asked in a muffled voice as her eyes widened in fear.

“Why?” asked the good doctor as he reached for the glass bottles. “Did you want to see if her cells physically and chemically changed?”

“No, I just realized I forgot to have JARVIS clean the hot tub.”

Clint sighed from across the room and CJ found it much easier to relax. All the Avengers had been running all kinds of tests on her since she came to, and after four plus hours, they seemed to have a never ending list things to check.

“Do you feel any tingling sensations in your fingers or toes?” Tony asked after he pulled his fingers out of her mouth.

“What’s that got to do with anything?” she asked.

“Some scientific possession methods include briefly changing your genetic makeup, so things will feel different to you. The way your nerves perceive feeling would be one of the last things to change back.”

CJ sat there and thought for a little while. “Um, no I don’t think so.”

“Damn,” Tony muttered. “Bruce, take off numbers 12 through 247 on the list of scientific possibilities.”

“What about 113?”

Tony shook his head. “No, we would’ve found residue behind her ear or tingling in her toes. Take it off.”

“And 217?”

“No, there isn’t any bruising or swelling of the feet.”

“Hey dad?” Toni interjected from one of the many computers scattered around the shop. “Did you double check number three hundred?”

“We discounted that a long time ago,” Tony replied. “And I told you not to call me that.”

“But we haven’t taken a CT scan yet. Maybe that’s what did this to her.”

“She would’ve had a major personality change,” Clint read from the more detailed list. “She was still a huge bitch.”
“Hey!” CJ shouted. “I’m not that bitchy!” she turned to Tony and attempted to look at his computer screen. “Now, how many different possibilities are there?”

“Well, we’ve managed to narrow it down to a couple thousand in a matter of four and a half hours.”

“Holy shit!”

“That’s what I said,” Brooke added as she carried a pot of coffee down the stairs. “It’s freakin’ ridiculous.”

“Not to mention, Loki has his own tests too,” Steve added from the table where he had been filling out some paperwork to get the tower properly repaired and the insurance to fully comply.

“Wait, he gets his own set of tests?” Clint exclaimed from his place.

“Yes,” Tony replied. “He’s the only magic user here. If she was magically possessed, he’d be the only one to find it.”

“Yeah, but if he did it, then he’ll pretend like he never found anything!”

“I can assure you, archer, that I had nothing to do with her possession,” Loki said from his spot next to Thor. “If it was magic, it was not mine.”

“Right, and if you’re the only one who can find any trace of magic, then you’d be able to hide your findings from us. You could outright lie to us!”

“Clint, cool your tits,” Brooke said as she poured herself a cup of go-juice. “I doubt he’d possess somebody to kill him and everyone else.”

“Why are we talking about tits?” Pamplemousse asked as she stumbled down into the lab, rubbing her eyes.

“Pamplemousse,” CJ said. “We don’t say that word.”

“Which one?” she asked. “I don’t think I said anything wrong.”

“She means tits,” Brooke said bluntly. “It’s another word for boobs.”

Pamplemousse covered her ears. “I’m not supposed to hear that word.”

“Then don’t say either of those words ever again,” CJ said soothingly.

The young girl nodded and sat down next to Thor. “Hi, Thor!” she said cheerily.

The god of thunder broke into a smile as he looked down at her. “Hello, Young Grapefruit. How do you feel after your bought of rest?”

“Great! I didn’t have any nightmares!”

“How wonderful!”

Tony shook his head. “I just knew you two would be best friends eventually.”

“Bruce,” Pamplemousse chimed. “Is other Tony being ‘sarcasmic’ again?”

He chuckled to himself as he shook his head. “No, not really.”

“But Toni and Brooke are my best friends!”

“I’m sure Thor doesn’t mind if you have other friends, too,” Bruce said soothingly. “In fact, I’m sure he’d like it if you did.”

“Pamplemousse, aren’t I one of your best friends, too?” CJ asked quietly.

Pamplemousse looked down at the ground sheepishly. “Well, you did try to kill me...”

“Now Pamplemousse, we don’t know that yet,” Bruce said calmly. “We think someone was making her do it.”

“But CJ’s strong,” she replied. “I thought CJ always said she can think for herself.”

“Sometimes that kind of thing doesn’t work,” Toni said as she sat down next to her friend. “Sometimes people can steal your mind and use it for themselves.”

“Oh,” she said quietly.

Thor clapped his hand on her back and smiled again. “Come, young one!” he boomed. “Let us go play the game where you conceal yourself, and I attempt to discover you!”

Pamplemousse’s eyes lit up. “You mean hide and seek?” she asked excitedly.

“Yes, that one!”

“Yay!” she shouted as she ran up the stairs and out of the lab. Thor went to follow, only to have Bruce grab him first.

“Thor, please don’t lose her,” he said.

“I will not, my friend,” Thor said reassuringly. “My brother and I would play this game for hours, and Asgard has many hiding places.”

Bruce nodded, feeling more at ease as he let go of the god. As he turned to look back at his findings, he noticed that everyone in the room had been staring at him. “What?” he asked.

“You’re such a mother hen,” Tony replied snidely.

“I am not! I’m simply making sure we don’t lose her for the sake of everyone here.”

Steve smiled to himself as he continued filling out insurance forms. “You must admit, Dr. Banner, you do seem to have a soft spot for her.”

Bruce shook his head, but couldn’t help but think of how right Steve was. He had taken Pamplemousse under his wing and protected her like she was…well, his own.

****

“Do you remember anything about your surroundings?”

CJ stared at Loki. “No,” she replied. “I don’t remember anything.”

“Think hard,” he said quietly. “No noises at all? No thoughts that ran through your head?”

CJ shook her head and Loki sighed. “It’s useless,” he mumbled. “We’ve been at it for over twelve hours and not a single thing has led us to an answer.”

Thor shuffled down the stairs and slumped into a chair.

“What’s wrong, Muscles?” Brooke asked as she sipped from yet another cup of coffee.

“I cannot find the grapefruit,” he sullenly admitted. “She is a much better hider than Loki ever was.”

Loki glared at Thor. “Certainly not!” he exclaimed lightly. “I have magic, and she is but a mortal.”

“But you always hid in the some of the same places, brother,” Thor retorted. “The young one is clever.”

“And I am not?”

“Come on, kids,” Tony said hastily. “We don’t want any blood shed now.”

“I never said you were not clever,” the blonde brother said calmly. “I only mean that my young friend is a better hider than you.”

Loki sighed and spun around to face CJ again. “Do you have any tingling sensations in your fingers or toes?”

“Seriously?!” CJ shouted. “I’ve been sitting in this same spot for almost thirteen hours and you’re asking me that questionagain?!

“Of course not!” Loki exclaimed. “You’ve left that spot plenty of times while Tony and the doctor have done their examinations.”

CJ moaned and slumped back in her chair. “This is so stupid!

Brooke and Clint rolled their eyes in unison.

“Don’t be such a pussy,” Brooke moaned back. “We’re all suffering here!”

Just then, Natasha waltzed in with a cup of hot chocolate from the café down the street in her hands. “Hey guys!” she said with a bubbly voice. “Find anything yet?”

“No!” shouted Tony, Loki, and Toni.

Toni sighed and stood up from her spot at the computer. “Maybe we should all just take a break,” she said as she stretched. “We probably won’t find anything, so why bother going over the lists a thousand and one times.”

“You’re just giving up?” Clint asked.

“No,” Toni replied. “I just think we should take a day or two to collect ourselves and the data settle. There are some tests that will take about forty-eight hours to finalize, so we should just relax a little. Besides, I don’t think we’ll have to worry about another attack so soon.”

As Toni’s words hung in the air, small footsteps paraded down the stairs. Pamplemousse jumped out from around the corner, smiling. “You didn’t find me!” she shouted. “I win!”

Comments

Chapter 28 is sad because Cj says "Let's just say I've got red in my ledger and I physically cannot wipe it out.". That's sad because Natasha says that in Avengers.

Natasha Barton Natasha Barton
10/17/16

I am going to cry. Natasha is my favorite Avenger and SHIELD agent. I've always looked up to her character. I almost cried during chapter 25 and got some weird looks from my family. Well they don't understand so if they have a problem then they can suck it.

Natasha Barton Natasha Barton
10/17/16

MAJOR SPOILERS! Unless you finished chapter 24

OH MY GOD!!!!!!! NATASHA"S DEAD!!!!!!!! AND SHE HAS A SISTER?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

Natasha Barton Natasha Barton
10/17/16

CLINT SAID HAWKWARD!!!!!!!!! THAT"S AMAZING!!!!!!!!!!! BEST PUN EVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Natasha Barton Natasha Barton
10/17/16

Are you planning on continuing in a sequel?

Anonyme_Amour Anonyme_Amour
3/20/14