Utter Darkness

A/N: Alright, so my knowledge of all things Marvel, and comic book related have been gleaned from the movies, and Wikipedia. I have messed around abit with the Norse Mythology side of this as well to suit my own purposes.


He leaned crookedly against the cave wall, and coughed weakly. A bit of blood dribbled from the corner of his mouth. He barely had the strength to wipe the mess from his face. He slumped to the ground and took stock of his situation. He was depleted both magically and physically. His original plan to sneak in and out of the weapons vault on Asgard had gone awry. The test runs were scheduled for three days from now. Stark would not be able to prevent Foster from running it indefinitely. He had at most a week before they would run the Bi-Frost Replicator.

He gave a hollow laugh; at least his cloaking spell was still intact. He knew The Other and Thanos were still trying to find him, to monitor his movements and to discover his plans. He was badly injured, something internal. He didn’t even have enough magic left to do a proper diagnostic spell on himself. Well, that wasn’t completely true, he could, but to exert that effort would compromise the integrity of the cloaking spell.

He coughed again, and this time quite a bit more blood came up. He leaned to the side trying not to gag on the blood. He needed to rest and heal, but he still had other things to do. His mind began to drift as he lay there in a state of semi-consciousness.

“You stubborn boy! You could never simply ask for help could you?” He felt gentle hands cleaning the blood from his face, and guiding his body to a more comfortable position. “Men and their damn pride…”

He was hallucinating now, surely. “How could you…Why would you…” his voice sounded weak and frail and he hated it.

Her face finally came into view, “Because no matter how much you deny it, you are my son.”

“Mm… Mm… Frigga? How did you find me? My cloaking spell, it’s impenetrable.” He grimaced.

“It is the same spell I taught you, is it not? I may have taught everything you know, but I have not taught you all that I know.” She smiled softly at him as her hands moved quickly.

He could feel whatever tear or grave injury he had done to his abdomen, begin to knit together. “Stop.” He growled and pushed at her hands, “You’ll expend too much magic and not be able to return home.”

She brushed his hands away. “Shush, and let me work.” As always, her hands moved elegantly, weaving her healing magic. In a matter of a few moments, the injury to his abdomen was healed.

He gave her a calculating look. Such a wound to be healed with relative ease, she was far more powerful than she let on.

She could easily read the set of his jaw and the look in his bright green eyes. “Of course I hide the extent of my power. I wouldn’t want your father to feel unmanned by the imbalance of our strengths.” She graced him with a crooked smile.

“He is not my father.” Loki hissed.

Frigga sat back on her heals, with a heavy sigh. “My beautiful idiot.”

“Would that not be an insult more suited to your son?” Loki grumbled as he attempted to stand.

“You are also my son and I’ll not hear another cross word from you.” She placed one firm hand on his shoulder, causing him to stay seated. “And, at the moment I am quite certain it is an apt description of you. Now, I have much to explain to you. So you will listen to me.”

He gave her a petulant look but remained seated.

“I knew whose child you were the moment Odin placed you in my arms.” She gently smoothed a bit of hair from his face and rested her hand on his cheek. “You have your mother’s eyes. Since coming to the knowledge of your heritage, did you not wonder about your skill with magic? Magic is always inherited, it can be taught and therefore the level of skill increased, but a person must be born with the skill to start with.”

There was confusion in his eyes. “The Jotuns have a great skill in manipulating ice, but it is exceptionally rare for one to have any magic, let alone the level of skill that you possess. Come now, an average Frost Giant stands at eight to ten cubits, has no magic, and has no hair. You are four and half cubits, you have magic, and hair. Surely you’ve…” her blue eyes glistened a bit. “Surely you’ve wondered about your true mother?”

Loki blinked in shock. Actually, while he knew about Laufey, he had never considered who his mother might be. He had never even associated the word mother with any other than her. He shook his head.

Frigga sat beside him and composed herself with a small shaky breath. “Many many years ago, Asgard and Vanaheim were to forge an alliance through the marriage of the eldest princess of Vanaheim to the King of Asgard. However, the princess had fallen in love with another and ran away shortly before the ceremony. Fortunately, there was a younger princess, and I had fallen in love with Odin. The alliance was still forged and for many years, there was no word from Farbauti. I was far too busy being Queen of Asgard, and bearing an heir to be concerned with my wayward sister, much to my shame. The war with Jotunheim came swiftly and we were all shaken by the devastation it caused. Thor was only about four years old. When Odin returned with you I knew, Farbauti’s secret love had been Laufey. You are all I have left of her.”

She reached to place her hand on his face and he pulled away from her, his voice rough and accusing, “Why did you never tell me these things?”

“Do you recall the reason Odin took you and Thor to the weapons vault when you were boys?”

Loki shook his head.

“Laufey had two elder sons, Byleistr, and Helblindi, by a frost giantess. They were far older than you were and had become arrogant and reckless. They decided to come and take back the Casket of Ancient Winters. They were caught and killed by Heimdall. Laufey then had no heirs, except for you, the child he had rejected years before. Less than a day later, Laufey demanded your return. Odin refused and installed the destroyer in the vault. The destroyer had only two purposes. To protect and defend the Casket… and you.”

Loki sat in shocked silence.

“I had always intended on telling you of your true heritage when I felt you were old enough to understand. Byleistr and Helblindi’s attack came at a terrible time, and cost us greatly. I was with child, and the stress and strain of the attack and Laufey’s demand had caused me to miscarry. That was the reason you boys were with your father that day. Odin was angry because of the attack and because of Laufey’s attempt to take you from us, and he told you boys about the war in far more detail than I think he should have. After I was recovered, he told me of what had occurred and forbade me from telling you the truth. He truly only ever wanted to protect you.”

Loki was silent for a long time. He struggled to stand and this time she allowed it. He paced up and down the cave, his hand trailing along the wall for balance. As he processed the information, his mind reeled.

Frigga stood and watched as he paced, the only outward sign of her distress was the subtle wringing of her hands. Though he needed to know all that she had shared, she knew it was more important that he focus on the task ahead of him. “Loki…” she spoke softly as she tried to lay a hand on his shoulder.

His face was a mask of pain and confusion when he turned to her, “Why, why now? Why would you tell me all of this now?”

“It was something I should have told you long ago, but I’d not had the opportunity until now.” She shook her head, she needed to redirect him. “Loki you’ve come to a crossroads. You know the whole truth now. Soon, and I cannot tell just when, you will have a decision to make and that decision will alter the course of your future. You’ve done terrible heinous things, but you can have a bright future. Don’t allow the poor choices of others and your hurt and anger to prevent you from having that future.”

An anxious look of comprehension dawned, “You’ve been to see the Norns.” He grabbed her by the upper arms, “What did they ask of you? What did you have to sacrifice?” His eyes were wild and searching. “Why would you go to those harpies?”

She gently disengaged her arms from his tense grip and laid one hand on his cheek. “I can see much in my scrying pool, but even I cannot see all. You were slipping away from me into madness. I had to do something. As for the cost, it is none of your concern.” She whispered.

He knew then, she had sacrificed something of great value to her. “Frigga…”

She shook her head.

“Mother.” It came out as a broken whisper; tears clouded his vision. He fell to his knees before her.

“Oh my son,” She sank to her knees as well, gathered him into her arms, and held him as she had when he was a boy.

They remained like that for hours. There were murmured apologies, forgiveness abounded and tears as well.

She sat up a little straighter and tried her tears. She knew what objects he had stolen from the vault and what their significance was. The Norns had told her much, but there was nothing she could offer them to find out the outcome of the coming confrontation. She had even willing offered them her own life. They would not tell her. They claimed that the outcome was unclear even to them.

She had carefully filtered more of her strength and magic into him as they sat together. He would need every bit of strength and magic he could muster in the coming confrontation. Black spots crept into her vision and there was a heaviness in her limbs. She pulled weakly at him, he sat up beside her, and she handed him her handkerchief. When he’d cleaned his face he handed the handkerchief back, and she rested her head upon his shoulder. “Now tell me about this Darcy Lewis that has so captured your heart.”

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

This was an ugly cry, not happy tears or just a few tears that slipped out when she was upset. No, she was heartbroken, confused, injured, and angry, so very very angry. She had trashed most of her apartment. She had been upset since the day it happened. This explosion was slow in coming. Jane had told her everything she knew about what had happened, though that was admittedly little. The guys had returned to the vault with the worst blow of all though.

Loki…

She screamed again, her voice was ready to give out. Her thoughts were cyclical; the questions kept turning around in her mind, along with what Jane had told her.

The doctor had confirmed she had been intimate, that the intercourse had been rough, but he could not honestly determine if it was consensual or not. They had hardly left her alone from that point on. Jane, Erik, Bruce, Pepper, and even Steve had been her babysitters; there was always at least one person with her. She was tired of their simpering and pity filled gazes. It had been a whole week. Finally, one day when it was only she and Erik, she told him she needed to change clothes and convinced him to go out in the hallway. Then she had JARVIS lock everyone out. What started as a cleansing cry had become a pain-filled destructive tantrum. Oddly enough, it was Stark that convinced the rest to allow her this time alone.

Hours later as she sat in the wreckage of her living room, she heard a tentative knock on her door. “Hey kiddo, can I come in?” Stark again. Jane said that she and Stark had grown close over the past month or so. He had come to her rooms several times in the past week to check on her but had never stayed long.

“What do you want?” she croaked.

“I come bearing caffeinated offerings.” She could hear the smile in his voice.

She sighed weakly and wiped her face with the end of her sleeve. “Whatever.” She answered. “Alright JARVIS you can let him in, but lock it after he comes in so no one else gets in here please.”

“Yes, of course Ms. Lewis. Will there be anything else?” The AI asked politely as Stark came in.

“No, that’s all. Thanks J.”

Tony shut the door quietly and surveyed the damage Darcy had done. “Damn, kiddo. Remind me not to get on your bad side,” he said with a low whistle. He looked kinda haggard as he stood there. His hair was a mess, he had bags under his eyes, and he had a defeated slump to his shoulders.

“So can I have my coffee, or are just gonna stand there staring at my mess?” she grumbled.

He handed her the cup and sat beside her. “So you want to talk about it?”

She shook her head. The cup was blessedly warm. As she opened the lid, the sweet aroma of caramel drifted up to comfort her. She looked at the cup, and took a quick sip. It was a caramel latte made exactly the way she liked it, (with an extra shot of espresso, and a dollop of whip cream) from her favorite little coffee shop down the street. “How did you know?”

“You’ve forgotten a lot.” He smiled softly, “I’ll tell you what; you don’t feel like talking, that’s okay. How about I talk for a while and you just listen?”

She took a sip of her latte and nodded. He filled in some of the blanks for her. Turns out he knew more than Jane because of their talks and the fact that he had installed cameras in her apartment. He had even been privately monitoring them to keep an eye out for her safety.

“Look whatever his ultimate goals are, I think he has genuine feelings for you. I think it was kinda unexpected for him, but the way he looked at you, how gentle and careful he was with you when you were hurt, that wasn’t fake. What happened between the two of you on that last night, I think it was consensual. Cause right after that he told me; well no more like ordered me, to keep you safe while he was gone. I’m pretty sure he plans on coming back. I don’t know why he took your memories though; maybe he thought he was protecting you.”

She was so quiet, “Did I know that it was him?”

Tony could hear the fear in her voice and shook his head. “Not initially, no. You had grown fond of him, but all you knew was that he was an ex-con. I think you were really starting to like him and then you figured it out. You didn’t sleep for three days after you found out. You did a lot of research online and figured out about certain drugs that suppress REM sleep. Then you went raiding. You hacked JARVIS, broke into my apartment, and stole some Xanax from me.”

Darcy’s eyes were huge, “Damn, sorry.”

Tony shrugged. “Water under the bridge. I think you were trying to get over him. It was less than a day later when you got hurt so bad. Apparently, he healed you, and you guys worked it out. I stayed out of it because I figured maybe you could help reform him.”

They sat there quietly for a long time. “Thank you Tony.” She whispered.

He looked surprised, “For what?”

“You’re the first one who didn’t come in here looking at me like I was a broken doll that needs fixing.” She rested her head on his shoulder.

He looked startled but he didn’t pull away. “No problem kiddo, I do my best to take care of the important stuff.” He patted her hand. “I guess you qualify.”

She straightened up and looked at him. He seemed to be genuine but it was like his actions and choice of words were very deliberate. “Why did you say that?”

“Because I meant it?”

“No why did you say it like that, you’re choosing your words so carefully, why?”

He gave a long sigh. “We’ve had a similar conversation before. I was hoping to jog your memory. Did it work?”

She shook her head. “No, but I guess it was worth a shot. So, you really mean that then?” He nodded. “Thanks Tony.” She laid her head back on his shoulder.

Tony was quiet for a long time. “Oh and by the way, still not happy about you hacking into JARVIS.”

Darcy laughed for the first time in a week.

Notes