Aftermath

“Don’t touch me.” Loki says sleepily to Thor. Thor is carrying Loki bridal style down the hall from the medical bay to his room, well their room now. Bruce follows close behind carrying their daughter. A laundry basket was acquired and filled with blankets to create a make shift bassinet. Tomorrow Thor will take Loki out to get actual baby items for their child. Though Thor tried to be gentle while carrying Loki, he still managed to wake him. Loki is fully alert by the time Thor lays him down on the bed.
Loki wants to think about fleeing but is too exhausted. Child birth took a lot out of him and he just doesn’t have any fight in him at the moment. Once Bruce has helped them settle in, he takes his leave. The new couple have much to discuss.
Thor takes up the other half of the bed and lies on his side facing Loki. Loki turns on his side and faces him. Thor has a big grin on his face as he looks upon his new husband and mother of his child. A section of Loki’s long hair has gone astray. Thor reaches out to tuck it behind Loki’s ear.
“I said don’t touch me.” Loki says flatly. That wiped the smile off the big oaf’s face.
“We should probably talk you and I.” Thor says.
“Yes, well, for starters you do realize that by marrying me you have agreed to a lifetime of celibacy. Because if you think I’m fucking you again you are crazier than a shit house rat.” Loki’s words are like a dagger in Thor’s heart.
“Forgive me Loki. Please, I beg you. Do not start our marriage this way.” Thor entreats him.
“Our marriage! You planned this all along didn’t you! And people think I am the devious one. Tell me Thor. Did you use a fertility charm or was it sheer dumb luck?” Loki is on his feet on the other side of the bed. Thor is standing as well. The width of the bed feels like an ocean between them.
“I didn’t know Loki. Why didn’t you tell me?” Thor asks.
“So you could capture me and toss me into a cell and take my daughter from me when she was born! Oh no Thor! This wasn’t what I hoped for but so far I’m at least not behind bars. I’m just married to my rapist brother.” Loki whisper yells. The baby is sleeping.
“You told me not to call you brother anymore! I asked you, after the first round, I asked your permission and you said YES! You cannot tell me some part of you doesn’t want this too!” Thor accuses him.
“As if that excuses the humiliation and pain you inflicted upon me! You held me up against a wall, ripped my clothes off, and fucked me senseless. Asking for my permission after was a moot point when all you had to do was hold me down again.”
“And what of the pain you have inflicted upon ME! You’ve tried to KILL me more than once! And when you failed at that you succeeded in maiming me and driving me mad! What was I to do Loki? Every man has his breaking point, and I have loved you for so long…” Thor plops down on the bed with his back to Loki. Thor tries to stifle his sobs. Over a thousand years of pent up longing had driven Thor to do the unspeakable. Thor had truly only intended to apprehend his brother that day so that he might face justice. But when Thor had him in his grasp the realization dawned on him that he would never be with Loki the way that he wanted. He would never be able to share with Loki all the love that was in his heart. Loki would either rot in prison or lose his head on the executioner’s block. Thor’s love would go unrequited. That’s when Thor lost his sanity and ripped Loki’s clothes off.
“And just how long have you felt this way about me?” Loki asks but he is afraid of the answer.
“All our lives I think. Since adolescence to be sure. I remember desiring you at an early age. I was confused by it at first. I understood what it was the first time I lay with a girl. She was one of my chamber maids. She had long black hair and green eyes like you.” Thor confesses. Loki remembers that chamber maid. Her name was Rowenna or Rowen or something. Loki opens his mouth to respond but is cut off by the mewling sounds of his child in the basket. She’s hungry.
Her first little cries come out and Loki feels an immediate wetness on his chest. The t-shirt he’d been given is soaked through now. Loki sees himself in the mirror and is horrified by this appearance. Besides looking haggard from pushing another person out of his body, he now possesses what could easily be described as an ample bosom. Tony would call it a nice rack. His pert perky nipples are hard and leaking. Combine that with his long hair and delicate facial features, Loki might as well putt on a dress right now. Ugh! First thing in the morning he is cutting his hair.
Loki quickly discards the shirt, going full frontal on Thor. He doesn’t care. Let him stare at what he can’t have. Loki bends over and gently lifts his little girl up and cradles her to feed. She latches on quickly and starts suckling in earnest. Loki sits back down on the bed and leans against the headboard. He looks down at his child who is looking back up at him with her eyes wide open. Her tiny fingers wind themselves around a lock of Loki’s hair. The slight tugging on his scalp sends little electric pulses of contentment throughout Loki’s body. Combined with the sensation of feeding his child from his breast, Loki feels a deep and abiding joy he has never known before. Okay, maybe he won’t cut his hair tomorrow.
_________________________
“Mckayla?”
“Rebecca.”
“Sara.”
“I like Lori.”
“Her name is Aroha.” Loki says with finality. Everyone stands back up from being bent over the bassinet.
“Aroha is very pretty. What does it mean?” Natasha asks.
“Love.” Thor says with a big grin. Thor looks so damn happy that his face is about to split. Loki looks more….weary. He comes out the bathroom where he was getting dressed and walks over to the bassinet to pick up his daughter. Something about having his child surrounded by his enemies makes him nervous. Go figure. They might be Thor’s friends, but the archer has plenty of reasons to seek revenge. The red head too. All of them really. Loki does not feel safe here. He would leave, if he had anywhere else to go. Loki could make it alone if he had to, but Thor is here and his child needs Thor in her life. Loki doesn’t want to run anymore. He’s too damn tired.
They’d spent the day yesterday shopping for baby items and fighting over names. Aroha was actually one of Loki’s suggestions. Thor said yes immediately. They didn’t talk much about the future though. Both of them are still in the dark as to what their mother has managed to accomplish on their behalf in Asgard. Waiting for news is excruciating. Loki settles down on the bed for another feeding. The others take the hint and give Loki his privacy. Thor leaves as well. He needs some air and time to think.
Thor goes into the kitchen to get some coffee. Steve and Natasha join him. They look at each other and then at Thor. Thor knows that his friends have questions about his conduct. About….well…everything.
“So we’ve all been meaning to ask, if what Loki said was true?” Steve asks.
“What happened Thor?” Natasha interrogates.
“It was after the spider attack. I’d been bitten and was in a lot of pain. I was furious. I’d spied Loki hiding in his perch. He didn’t know that I had spotted him. I followed him home to apprehend him….and I….I…..”Thor can’t finish the sentence. He’s choking on his tears.
“Thor how long have you been in love with Loki?” Steve asks.
“My whole life. I have never told him how I felt and never acted on my desires before.” Thor continues to spill his thoughts, feelings, memories, and desires about Loki. When Thor gets to the part about Tony and Steve interrupting his and Loki’s meeting upon the rock; Steve winces. The whole invasion might have been averted if they had not interrupted them. Thor would have confessed his feelings and Loki might have gone for it.
“Do you think Loki reciprocates your feelings?” Natasha asks.
“I think he does, on some level, yes. But he is angry with me. It is ironic that the very act that set all this in motion, that caused us to marry, is the same act that puts more distance between me and Loki than ever. We sleep in the same marriage bed and yet the gulf between us is like a canyon. I don’t know how to close the distance.” Thor says sounding defeated.
“Might I make a suggestion?” Steve says. Thor looks at him pensively.
“Take him out on a date. He might want to change his appearance though. If people saw the two of you in public together, like THAT, it might cause a bit of an outcry. We’ll babysit.” Steve finishes. Nat looks at him with a bit of surprise. She thought he’d be the last person to encourage the couple in this way.
“I think it will be a while yet before Loki will be comfortable leaving our child behind with anyone. Especially any of you.” Thor says.
“You are right on that point. We all need to sit down as a group and clear the air. The tension in the house is palpable.” Nat says. Just then rainbow light envelopes the balcony. Jarvis alerts everyone and they all emerge from different parts of the floor to gather. Loki has fear in his eyes as he cradles his child. It is Frigga. Loki relaxes only slightly at the sight of her. Her face is like stone and she has clearly been crying.
“Mother. What news from our father.” Thor says.
“Your punishment is as follows….” Frigga chokes out. “Loki your efforts to repay your debts for your crimes have been noted. To prove that you are truly penitent you are here by banished to Midgard for the next 100 years and will continue serving the people as you have the last several months.” She finishes.
“Your punishment Thor, for the crime of incest upon your own brother is to join him in banishment and look after Loki. Loki at no time are you allowed to block Heimdall’s gaze. Should you ever do so again, your father will send down soldiers to collect you and kill you immediately.” Frigga looks down at her shoes.
“My punishment for interfering is that I will not be allowed to visit either of you. I was right to force the two of you to marry.” Frigga is openly sobbing now. “If I had not forced you to marry with the temple priest present in front of Asgardian witnesses your father would have sent soldiers here to collect up the baby and kill it. He says it is an abomination, a product of incest. Now that she is in line for the throne he cannot touch her.” Frigga collapses into Thor’s embrace, sobbing loudly into his shoulder.
Thor and Loki look at each other and then their daughter. They are more grateful than ever for their mother, who is sacrificing so much on their behalf. They will not see her again for 100 years, but when they do they will all be alive.

Notes