“How is this my life?” As he leaned back in the chair.

“Sorry?” she said with a faint smirk on her face, as she used her hand to brush away some of her red curls

“Okay, Let me see if I got this right? You found a cat four months ago in an alley?” Hall asked as he pinched the bridge of his nose.

“Correct.” she said firmly

“You sneaked the cat into the tower, and then threatened Jarvis not to betray you.” He continued, not really believing the words that came out of his mouth

“Hmm Hmm,” she nodded.

“Barton and Lewis have been helping you take care of it, while you are away on missions.”

“Yup”

“You take the cat to the vet, for a checkup and while there, it was discovered there was a microchip tracker on it, that was broken.”

“Yeah, and it is a she” she stated with a death glare

“Sorry, my mistake, so the vet traces the chip back, and she was reported missing, so the vet contacted the original owners,”

“Uh-huh”

“You gave the cat back to the owners about a week ago, but you think the cat was abused.”

“Yes, sniff” she blew her nose into a tissue

“Now you want me to prove that the cat was abused, with no photos, and get her back from her owners, and then returned her back to you, because you miss her?”

“Pretty much, please?” she asked hopefully

The agent let out an exasperated sigh, “Jarvis, are they any pictures of the cat?”

“Yes Agent Hall, I do have some photos,”

“How is that possible, I disable all the cameras in my room?”

“Sir, had new ones installed, where the disabled ones were hidden.”

“I am going to kill Tony.”

“Later, right now, this is what I might need, Okay?”

“Fine!”

“Jarvis, let me see the pictures, please”

“Here you go Agent Hall,”

As the pictures appeared on his tablet, he studied them then he looked at her, god those green eyes, no wonder Barton loves her.

“Why am I not surprised, a Calico cat,”

“Actually no, it is a Russian Blue & Calico mix.” she said with a small proud smile.

“God, I am going to have a serious talk with you when I die. Okay let me see what I can do.”

“Thank you.”

“Natasha, why don’t you just steal the cat back?”

“Because that would be wrong.” She said with a confused look

“But it is okay, to be a master assassin, sneak around and blow stuff up, but not steal a pet out of a house.”

“I do have some values,” She said indignantly,”Bye,”and with that she was out the door. As the door closed, Hall sat back down in the chair.

“Jarvis,” As he leaned back in the chair, putting both hands on his face

“Yes, Agent Hall.”

“Am I in Hell?”

“No, Agent Hall, you are at the Avenger’s Tower in New York City.”

“Thank you, Jarvis,” He sighed.

“Or sometimes known as the emotional roller coaster Funny Farm, by Commander Hill,”

“Not helping Jarvis, Not helping.” as Robert got his phone out and made a phone call.

“Hi, and thank you for calling the Humane Society of New York, how can I help, My Name is Sandy Walters.”

“Figures,” Robert just rolls his eyes, “Hi, My Name is Agent Hall, I was wondering if I could speak to someone, I believe I may have a case of animal abuse?”

“Oh, that is sad, how can I help?”

“Well I was wondering, I am in New York City, I could come down and talk to you.”

“Sure, we can setup something, can you come down now?”

“Sure, that is about a fifteen minute walk. I will be right down,”

With that, Robert took the tablet and walked to the Humane Society, to see what he could do to help his friend.

---

Bronx New York

“I don’t understand why you brought that stupid cat back, it was better when it was gone.” a man said while watching TV.

“Shut up, you asshole, you were the one that let it go on the street,” the female shot back

“That cat better stay out of my room and my stuff.” he warned

“Why do you have to be so mean, if you would be nice, maybe she would like you.” she asked

“Fuck off, keep that furbitch away from me, or I will break its other leg.”

“You hurt her, why, you are an asshole, I outta….” The man jumped off the couch and whipped out a gun, he pushed it in her face.

“You threatening me, bitch, you going to narc on me, I will kill you now bitch.”

She started crying, the way she always did, raising her hands to protect herself “No, babe, no, I am sorry. I’ll shut up.”

“Damn straight, Bitch,” and he sat back down,

---

“Well Agent Hall, I can tell you that this cat does appear abused, you see how she sits with her leg out?” the blond hair agent Sandy

“Yes, I see that, it points outward.”

“Well usually it stays even with the body, plus if you look here and here, the skin and hair look different,”

“More signs of abuse?”

“Hard to tell, I mean the photos would warrant at least a visit, so we can start an investigation.”

“Um, here is the information of the vet that my friend took her to, they should have the tracking number on file, I hope.”

“Yes, I will call them now.”

A few minutes later, she came back to Robert, “Well I talk to the vet, he does agree that he thinks it was abused, he gave us the tracking information and address, Let’s go now.”

“Hold on there a second,”

“What?”

“Well don’t you think we should see who lives there, clearly if they don’t respect an animal nine times out of ten, they don’t respect people. Let me have the address and I will call it in.”

“Okay here you go, good point.”

---

As they pulled up with a backup NYPD car, Sandy was shaking her head. “I think this is overkill?”

The Agent raised his eyebrows, “This house has been raided seven times for drugs and domestic abuse, better safe than sorry.”

As they walked up to the house, the cops were about ten steps behind them,

“Yo, Sam, Cops they are here, they are walking up to the door.” The girl said nervously, and the man clenched a fist.

“The fuck, you bitch, you ratted me, didn’t you?”

“No, no, it wasn’t me, I swear. Yo, Chill it out, they are just walking, be cool, maybe they will go away.”

As they walked up to the porch, they knocked on the door. It opened up a crack, “Can I help you?” came a female voice

“Hi I am Sandy Walters from the Humane Society, and this Robert Hall from SHIELD,” The two agents showed their badges, “May we come in please.”

“Why, what does this about?” The woman asked again

“We have a possible case of cruelty to an animal, and we would like to see.” Suddenly there was a loud voice.

“AWW Hell no, You Dumb Bitch, I am not going to jail for a cat, fuck that shit. I am going to shoot that bitch.” came from behind the door and what sounded like running to the back of the house

Robert immediately drew his gun, as well as the cops, Sandy stepped to the side. He kicked in the door and the two cops went flying in with Hall, they were able to subdue everyone quickly and no shots were fired. As the cops arrested the man and woman, Robert went looking around the house, he found one door that was open ajar and saw the drugs, scales, cash, and some other guns laying on a bed.

In another room the, door was ajar, as Robert walked in slowly, and there on the bed was a cat, she was shaking. Robert hoisted the gun, in his softest voice, “Hey kitty, Look I know you don’t trust me, but I am friends with her. If you want I will take you to her. I promise you will never have to be scared again.” The cat approached very slowly and smelled his hand, she licked his finger. Robert very slowly picked her up and cradled her.

“I never would have picked you as a cat person,” Sandy said to him, as she came into the room.

“I didn’t think so either, until I met 2 Calico sisters, and one of them claimed me.” He explained as he petted her.

---

Natasha felt like shit, the mission was hell, but completed. She had to train lousy recruits in the morning, deal with Barton, Stark and Thor yelling at each other because of the mission, and then be hungry because everyone ate all the food on her. As she opened her door, she didn’t bother to turn on the lights, she just plopped on the bed.

“No one ever cares, I just want to die.” She moaned, when suddenly she felt a slight movement and heard a faint purr. She looked over to her left and there she was walking up to her with a note around her neck. She smiled, and petted her gently, she took the note off her. As she read it,

I know you day sucked
So did hers

You are both loved
Tony knows, he will not be an issue
Pepper, Jane, Betty, and Darcy threatened him

If hungry, I have two pizzas and cat food.

Natasha, picked her up, “Well at least some people care, want to meet the rest of them, hmm my сумасшедший придурок?”

The cat looked at her and meowed, Natasha shook her head, “You were warned,”

And she walked out the door.

Author’s notes

сумасшедший придурок = Crazy dork (google translate)

Also, I don’t know how the Humane Society works, so I am just guessing.

But Cruelty to Animals is wrong

Notes