The D in Apartment 23

“Hey you, how was the walking bars?” Natasha asked the young doctor who was sat in the kitchen with a freshly brewed coffee.
“Well I’m still in this bloody chair so not good.” She offered Natasha a small smile shaking her head. “I spend my life telling people that they will get better but I don’t believe it myself. What if I’m in this chair for the rest of my life? How am I supposed to offer hope when there isn’t any for me?” She asked the woman she considered to be her best friend, who placed her hand over the doctors.
“Because there is hope. You can do this Harry I know you can, maybe you need a push.” Natasha smiled at her softly as Harry nodded.
“Where’s Bucky? I tried to find him but he wasn’t in his usual places?” Harry asked taking a sip of her still steaming mug. It had been three days since Bucky and herself and reconciled and she had barely seen him.
“He’s with Wanda. He told us about what you said about him not killing your parents and well I agreed with you. I think Steve sort of did too. Anyway, he said he needs to know the truth so Wanda is going to do her brain thing to take him back. It’s still sort of new for her, but, she said she knows what she’s doing.” Natasha smiled over at a pale Harry.
“When’s he having it done?” She asked quickly causing Natasha to frown.
“Today or tomorrow I think.” Natasha told her sitting forward. “Harry what’s wrong?”
“It won’t work, that’s regression. Like hypnotherapy where you relay the past. His past is that he believes he did it. Look Doctor Banner gave me his file and I’ve been studying it, anything the Winter Soldier does Bucky can’t fully remember. He said that sometimes he’d come around after a mission and see the bodies, he’d put two and two together and hope to get four. Sometimes there’s another factor that can make it five. Team that with anything they did whilst wiping him and Bucky isn’t going to remember a whole lot. Regressing him is just going to make him angry because he’s got second thoughts now and he won’t get that truth.” Harry told Natasha honestly and as quickly as she could.
“You’re saying it would have to be the Winter Soldier who got asked.” Natasha whispered when realisation hit in as Harry nodded.
“I got to stop him.” The doctor whispered and without a second thought she got out of her chair and rushed down the hall to Wanda’s room.

Harry didn’t even knock when she reached Wanda’s room, barging in she noticed Buck lay comfortable on the young woman’s bed, eyes closed as Wanda moved her hand at the side of his head gently. “Stop! Whatever you’re doing or about to do please stop!” Harry shouted breathing heavily as leaning on the bedside table for support.
“Doll?” Bucky opened his eyes sitting up instantly when he noticed her without her chair. “You’re walking!” He smiled rushing over to her as she held onto his arms tightly.
“Running actually.” She laughed. “This isn’t going to help you or work.” She told him her hands going to his cheeks to make him focus on her. “Bucky doesn’t know what happened to my parents.” She whispered hoping he understood what she was trying to say, not wanting to run the risk of saying the words out loud.
“Doll what do you mean?” He asked a slight laugh in his voice until he saw the pain in her eyes. “Harry?” He asked quieter this time.
“You don’t know who killed my parents. You weren’t there. He does.” She whispered her eyes filling with tears as Bucky was hit with realisation. He stumbled backwards until he dropped onto the bed. “Please don’t be mad. I studied your file, watched a few clips of HYDRA footage to determine what they did to you. What they did to your brain.” She whispered kneeling down on the floor in front of him, taking his hands in hers tightly. “You going back won’t achieve anything Bucky. The only way for you to move on from this is for you to trust me and believe me when I tell you that you or he didn’t kill them.” She whispered looking up at him crying more when she saw his pain filled face.
“I just want to remember for you. I just want to be better.” He whispered his own tears falling.
“I know you do, I want to help you Bucky, I want to make you better; but, this isn’t the way.” She whispered standing up slowly ignoring the pain in her legs as she sat at the side of him, closing her arms around him letting him sob brokenly. “I’m sorry Bucky I really am.” She whispered resting her cheek on his head.
“I need to know.” He whispered. “He has to come out, he needs to relive it for my sanity.” He whispered to her.
“Absolutely not.” Steve’s voice came from the door, both Bucky and Harry to wrapped up in their pain to notice he, Sam and Natasha were here hearing everything. “Buck letting him out is dangerous for everyone here! He tried to kill us all at some point.” Steve carried on not believing what he had just heard.

“Except for Harry.” Natasha pointed out walking deeper into the room as Steve glared at her. “Look I’m not saying it’s ideal but he won’t be able to move on without knowing. Harry needs that too. Bucky loves Harry so that has got to sit deep within Winter Soldier, right? The same way it did when he pulled you from the river in DC.” Natasha looked over at Steve who was glaring more at her.
“I don’t speak Russian.” Harry spoke up looking up at Natasha, not dismissing the idea.
“But I do. I can teach you.” Natasha shrugged. “The Soldier only killed people because that was his order too. Harry isn’t going to do that, just ask him for his mission report.”
“Like Zemo did?” Sam spoke out, clearly on Steve’s side.
“No Zemo did that then ordered him to attack. Plus, he was in a chamber and was angry!” Natasha pointed out. “This time he’ll be in a nice room, with the woman he loves in a comfortable setting. No guns.”
“He doesn’t need guns!” Sam shouted back.
“Everybody stop it!” Harry shouted, biting her lip when all eyes turned to her. “What do you want to do Bucky?” She turned her attention to him. “This is your choice.” She whispered holding his hand tightly. He paused for a moment thinking, he was looking at Harry’s face trying to read her thoughts but she wasn’t giving anything away; he knew she was going to be by his side no matter what.
“Teach her the words Natasha.” He tore his attention away from her to Black Widow. “And how to shoot a gun.” He stared at Natasha to make sure she understood as she nodded.
“Wait what? Shoot a gun why?” Harry asked shaking his hand to get his attention.
“For protection.” He whispered back to her, her eyes going wider.

Notes