To Teach a Trickster

Days passed and Loki started showing signs of getting better, much to the relief of Jane and Darcy as well as the entire medical staff. Ever since the first night Loki was checked into the hospital, there seemed to be an underlying war about to erupt between him and the nurses. It didn’t matter what the subject was. Loki refused to comply every time a nurse came into his room to do something. The only thing he didn’t fight against was when it came time to take his temperature. Learning that lesson the hard way the first night, Loki allowed the nurse to stick the thermometer in his mouth each time without a fuss. However, giving him sleeping medication was an entirely different story. The nurses had to switch to giving him pills since Loki would not let any of them come near him with a needle again. Although the first night he was given pills the nurse and Jane both had to fight to get them down him. Even with Jane’s given strength and Loki’s mortal state, trying to pry the trickster’s mouth open and poke a pill down him was no easy task. They eventually had to result to threatening to give him another shot if he didn’t take them. The choice was his to make, the nurse had said. Loki quickly chose the pills.

Another problem that quickly arose was Loki’s complaints about the hospital’s food. He refused to eat most of it, saying it looked and smelt horrible. He was especially leery of the green Jell-O, which he swore had to be some type of poison. Since Loki needed to eat to build up his strength, the nurses and the doctor agreed to let Jane and Darcy bring in outside food for him—anything, just so long as he ate something.

Little by little Loki’s fever started coming down, giving him some much-needed relief. He soon got to the point where he could sleep normally again without having to rely on sleep meds. And he started feeling well enough to get up and move around the room for more than just to use the bathroom and take quick showers. Each afternoon, after lunch, he would settle himself in the big padded, leather recliner and look out the window for awhile. Jane tried to spend as much of her time with him as she could and tried being there for him at all hours. It became a regular habit for Jane to bring some sort of game for them to play together, like cards, mancala, chess, or checkers. Some of the days, when she absolutely had to do work, she was late getting to the hospital. On these days, Darcy volunteered to fill in for her until she arrived, which helped a lot, both on Jane and Loki’s part. Jane didn’t like the thought of Loki being alone at the hospital. Not only because she knew that Loki wasn’t exactly stable as far as his posttraumatic stress went, but also because she didn’t trust him to remain in his room. Since Loki had in his mind that he was going to escape to find the scepter, this would be a golden opportunity for him to do just that. Besides, a bored trickster is never a good thing. She didn’t want another number-switching incident happening. That would be really bad in a hospital.

“Hey, Loki, how you doing?” said Jane cheerily one day as she closed the door and walked over to Loki. The trickster was up, sitting cross-legged in the recliner by the window. He turned his gaze to her and smiled weakly. He looked a lot better, she thought. At least the rash wasn’t as visible and his nose wasn’t runny anymore. She reached out and ruffled his hair, patting his shoulder.

“Okay, I guess,” he sullenly answered, roughly shuffling the deck of playing cards in his hands. “I would be better if I could go home. I’m tired of this miserable place. I don’t like being confined.”

Jane pulled a chair up and sat down beside him, putting the bag she held down on the floor. “Aw, I know. It won’t be long.”

“I don’t understand how you mortals can live this way.”

“You get used to it.”

Just then, a loud crash and clatter were heard outside in the hall as a gurney was quickly rushed by. Loki closed his eyes and sighed.

“This place is so noisy! I haven’t been able to sleep through the entire night for it all. Every time I drift off to sleep, some loud noise comes and startles me awake.” He ran his hand through his hair, mussing it up.

“You could always ask the nurse to give you something to help you sleep.”

“NO!” Loki shouted. He hugged himself, covering his arms with his hands. He visibly shuddered. “No more of that. No more darts and no more pills.”

A smirk lifted the corner of Jane’s mouth.

“Oh! I have something for you.” Jane picked up the bag she brought. She reached in and pulled out a sketch pad and some pencils and pens and handed them to Loki. He eagerly accepted them. “I noticed the one you have at the apartment is almost used up so I bought you a new one so you’d have plenty of blank paper to fill up here.”

“Thank you,” he said.

“I also got you something else.” Jane pulled out a plush floppy green dog and handed it to the trickster. Loki stared at it, hesitant to take it. She chuckled at his expression. “Go on, it won’t bite.”

Loki looked at her then slowly took the toy from her hand. He didn’t want to hurt her feelings, but he wasn’t exactly sure what to do with it. Oh, he knew what it was, but he couldn’t imagine what had propelled Jane to get it for him.

“It’s a child’s plaything,” he said. “Whatever would I want this for?”

Jane laughed. “It doesn’t have to be just for kids. Adults like them too. I just thought it would cheer you up a little. Sometimes it helps to look at something like this when you’re sick and in the hospital.”

A lopsided smile formed on his face as he looked at the fluffy dog in his hand. Despite himself, he squeezed the toy and felt and fingered the softness of the material.

“Thanks,” he softly said, putting the dog in his lap. He would never admit it out loud, but he actually liked it. He especially liked the shade of green it was. He eyed Jane as she crumpled the bag up and put it back on the floor.

“So, what do you want to do today?” she said.

“Want to see a card trick?” said Loki, his eyes showing a faint hint of a sparkle.

“Sure!” said Jane.

Loki beamed excitedly and began shuffling his cards. “I’ll need a flat surface.”

Jane got up, walked over, and pulled the hospital tray over to where they were sitting, adjusting it to the right height. “Will this do?”

“Perfect,” he said, putting the deck of cards on it and laying out six select cards face up. “Now, I want you to think about one of these cards.”

Jane studied the cards for a minute, then looked up at Loki and nodded. Loki gathered up the cards and picked up the deck and put them all together again with a few fancy moves of his hands, placing them down on the tray between them.

“Tell me which card you thought of.” he said.

“Jack of Diamonds,”

Loki began spelling out Jane’s choice of card with each card he took off the deck. When he got to the last letter, he pulled off the Jack of Diamonds and handed it over to Jane, smiling.

“That’s amazing,” she said, taking the card. “How did you do that?”

“Magic,” he simply said. “A magician never reveals his secrets.”

“Right; I forgot.”

“Of course, this is Midgard’s idea of magic—simple, primitive, not magic at all, really.” He made the whole deck perfectly stand on its side on his fingers. “A little bit of prestidigitation and you mortals think you’ve seen something extraordinary. If I still had my real magic I would give you something worth marveling over. I could turn every one of these cards into snakes if I wanted to.”

“Really?”

“Yep,” Loki looked up at her, a twinkle of mischief in his green eyes. “I used to turn the kitchen utensils into snakes all the time back on Asgard, for a bit of fun. You should have seen the cooks and the kitchen and scullery maids scream.”

Loki and Jane laughed. Loki’s laugh was so genuine, she thought. No hint of malice or darkness or hurt—just a young boy laughing at remembering a good memory. She had to wonder…Was this the way he used to be before he turned?—a carefree, happy, mischievous, fun-loving boy?

“When you get your magic back, will you come by and show me some of your tricks?” said Jane.

Loki studied her face, quite taken back at her request. “You want to see my tricks?” He said it in such a way that Jane was almost sure he had never been asked to perform his tricks before. “You really want to see my tricks?”

“Of course,” she replied with a bit of a smile. “Why wouldn’t I?”

“No one’s ever wanted me to do them on purpose.” He plopped the plush dog onto the tray and picked at the fur. “Most people see it as a nuisance and childish. Well, except for Mother. But there was a time or two when even she got annoyed at me. A trickster doesn’t fit in with normal people. I’m…different.”

“But that’s what makes you so special,” said Jane, softly. “The world—this universe—needs people like you to remind all of us that life shouldn’t be lived so seriously—that it’s okay to have fun, to be a child at heart, to change and shake up things. As long as it isn’t harmful and malicious, of course. Sometimes I feel like I need to be reminded of it on occasion. Having you around has helped bring that to my attention within the past several weeks.”

Loki blinked at her words. He tilted his head to the side, which caused Jane to laugh at his expression.

“I know you’ve been through a lot and it’s understandable why you’re mad at the world. I’ve had my moments where I’ve felt like destroying something, too. But, life goes on. Sooner or later you have to wake up and move on. You’re a special person, Loki, and you’re important. Don’t ever let anyone tell you otherwise.” Jane stretched out her hand and brushed a lock of his hair out of his face. “Just keep telling yourself that. Stop lying to yourself and stop entertaining dark thoughts. You’re doing more harm to yourself than you realize.”

Loki was silent as he thought about what she said. No one had ever told him he was special or that he was important, except for maybe Frigga.

“You say that I’m important and special, even after I’ve done such awful things?”

“Sure,” Jane shrugged. “Loki, no one’s perfect. We all make mistakes and we all make bad choices sometimes. I don’t know of anyone who doesn’t have regrets of some sort. But that doesn’t mean we’re any less special or important in this life. You’re an individual that has a purpose, regardless if you want to accept it or not. You have a purpose, Loki. You’re a trickster. Part of a trickster’s purpose is to bring about playfulness and make people laugh. If you ask me, that’s one of the most important purposes there is because the world can always use more of that. Don’t darken your purpose by dwelling on self-pity. Don’t bother yourself with Odin either. There will always be people who will try to dampen your spirits. You might as well get used to it. People like that haven’t learned how to have fun, or they don’t know how to because they don’t understand it. So instead they see it as being childish and stupid.”

Loki’s eyes watered, but he was determined not to cry. He wanted to say something, but he didn’t know what. So he just nodded.

Jane picked the dog up and playfully rubbed it on Loki’s face, causing him to giggle and take it from her hand. He tossed it at her, hitting her in the face. She tossed it back at him. The dog was thrown back and forth in this way several times until it became a game that sent both of them laughing. It was during this time that Darcy entered the room.

“Whoa!” she said, stepping out of the way of Jane and dodging the dog at the same time. “What’s going on here? Is this ‘Toss the Dog’ day or something?”

Loki and Jane were laughing so hard they couldn’t answer. Darcy soon joined in, the laughter being contagious. She didn’t know what she was laughing at, but she had no other choice but to give in. It was okay since Jane and Loki had no idea what they were laughing at either. Loki felt freer that afternoon than he had felt in a long time. Jane’s words seemed to open up something inside of him that he had been keeping locked away for so long, and he felt more like his old self again—that innocent, fun-loving trickster that brought so much mirth and joy to the halls of Asgard so many years ago, before the malice and darkness took control. He wasn’t sure what to think of it, or whether or not he liked it.

Notes