The silver's tears
"That's it i'm calling it in" Stark huffed waving his hand and start walking away so he won't wake up Loki sensing an argument coming
"What,are you serious Stark? an hour barely passed!" bucky almost growled at him
"Whoa,easy there and yes an hour passed a complete 60 minutes with me not latching at you so yeah i'm serious" Tony said closing his eyes trying a count to ten maybe it calms his stupidly fast heart beats
"And you're doing great Tony, just hold on for more time okay for Loki's sake not anyone else okay, don't you see how much he needs to sleep" Pepper pleaded him holding his hand with her both
"It's the guys not his freaking father or the douches, even Thor won't be with them, god only knows where is that idiot" Tony said quietly
"Still he won't feel safe, didn't you see how he reacted to you two ?!" Bucky said worry started to be seen on his face
"He didn't do anything , he was too tired to do anything" Pepper muttered
"whether i like it or not Steve was one of the people he trusted most and where steve goes the rest go so that means Tasha,Bruce and Clint everyone had his way with him" Tony sighed at the memory
"No buts, don't you wanna see your boyfriend or did you have a change of heart for sleeping beauty over there" Tony slyly asked
"What..boyfriend..sleeping beauty ?" Bucky gaped not able to make sense of what he just heard
"Tony,I think you broke him" Pepper whispered to him grinning
"Wait just a second, you think me and Steve are uh together ? he is my best friend you moron and that's it" bucky said pointing a finger to Ton'y chest
"He was ready to fight me for your sake the last time he called me asking me to back off, you don't fight your friend for another friend blindly like that if he was just your best friend right"Tony shrugged shifting a little to hide how much this hurts
"Yeah that's Steve, loyal to a fault can be a jerk sometimes too and never ever doubts he is a big idiot but he is a goof so he will come apologizing to you soon believe me i'll make sure of that" bucky gritted his teeth in anger
"So sleeping beauty it is huh" Tony grinned at him with eyes sparkled with appreciation for what he said
"Christ, he is just a kid , a literally decade gap ,you don't have to label every relationship you know ?, sometimes a bond is formed it doesn't have a name and sometimes it doesn't make sense what could possibly bring these two together when they have nothing in common but that's it that's the thing they have in common , back in time steve and i were like that he was stubborn , determined , loyal and all serious , me ? I was more like uh thor and you mixed up together yeah , and then the fall, and all the hydra shit , I thought being stuck in time not mine will made me have something more in common with Steve but he kept pushing this one wanting the one he knew he thought he was helping me ,I know he meat well but remembering wasn't that easy and the more I remembered the more I wanted to forget , we were both hurting in a different way for the opposite reason , then I talked to Thor and it hit me I was looking for something in common with the wrong person Steve won't understand but Loki would and he did , he did not only understand me he fixed me too , he took away everything they did to me ,gave me my memories back and eased the pain of remembering , some days are rough than others but we managed , so many sleepless nights, another restless and few ones like this one , it's the small things that makes the life livable , we manage to live .."
"not live to manage " Tony said in shaky voice
"yeah Howard used to say that every time we had a problem or fight me and Steve then Peggy, your father was my friend tony, a good one too so don't you ever think I was in here when I did it" bucky pointed to his head and Tony felt his legs shaking can't carry his weight anymore and bucky ran to his side holding him walking him to the nearest tree sitting him under its shade kneeling beside him while Pepper sat the other side holding his hand
"It was the first thing I remembered you know and it barely killed me that Loki had to use his powers to make me sleep and it was the night he fixed it all ,he took all of it he knew I wouldn't survive it, living with all these memories and their guilt would've eaten me alive , he was the one that kept pushing me to come to you he said you would understand the same way Clint understood him and I do trust him to a fault so I came" bucky sighed sitting next to him "the one who killed your is dead Tony ,he died the moment I met Loki" he said quietly smiling back at the sleeping man near them
"Forgiving you will take time heck I can't forgive myself in the first place so don't take your hopes high in meantime i'll manage, that's what life is about right? managing " he sighed loudly
"forgive yourself?! Tony I knew your father he did all of that for his yet unborn child , he loved you before even you were born , he loved you to a fault and everything he did, everything he created was nothing compared to having a son , after every discovery or creation he would remind himself that his greatest creation was yet unborn , Tony he even made us meet his beloved Maria, you know how he loved Steve and was the first one to believe in him so he would bring her on several occasions to meet the guy to get to know him very well so when the time comes and they decide to have a baby they knew what role model he will be raised upon, he saw Steve as his hero and wanted you too be your own hero..his hero" bucky said softly putting a hand on his shoulder " but unfortunately you became quite the opposite" bucky said wryly
"What do you mean?" Tony asked taken a little
"My boy you grew up to be more like me not this dumb-ass" bucky chuckled
"Okay stop it and Tony, did too , sorry" Pepper said giggling relieved that they reached that point "you two apparently have a lot in common and more lot to talk about but right now you woke up someone" she said freaking out a little bit
"uh oh "bucky said moving to his side slowly so he won't puzzle him
"What uh oh ?" Tony asked moving beside him
"I think It's one of those restless nights I told you about and they are no fun well he is no fun"
"What do you mean ? and quickly, he is not dozing in again"
"Well after he fixed me it turned out he took my pain literally so his mood became shifty uh shiftier than he was, and in extreme ways too" bucky said quietly sitting next to Loki who shifted in his place opening his eyes wincing a little
"Couldn't sleep just a little bit longer could you" bucky said smiling at him , Loki huffed, straighten up his position and started to scrub his head gently
"Headache again huh"bucky muttered putting his palm on his temple "normal , no fever this time, well I guess you just missed me" bucky teased him and loki just eye rolled at him
"Really why did you wake up that fast ,it has been three days now Loki you're running on fumes now" he said quietly taking his hand so he won't run away like usual , he needed to know what makes him that scared to have a proper sleep!
Loki was good at hiding his feeling , wearing the perfect poker face but his eyes will always be the one thing he can't control and it is like a window to his soul and right now bucky could see a pure fear in them
"We made each other a promise and you're not someone who breaks his promises ,so tell me what's wrong" bucky's voice became louder and everyone can feel the tension in the air and the couple shifted awkwardly not knowing what to do aside moving back a little giving them some space.
"No I won't let go of you till you tell me what's wrong with you"bucky said in a surprisingly quiet voice but Loki kept on fidgeting on his grip "you know you can't break free from it so you might also start explaining anytime soon" bucky grinned at him shifting to more relaxing position closing his eye a little wearing what loki called his goofy smile
Loki pouted giving up to him and moved a little closer putting his head on his chest and bucky moved his free hand to pat his hair slowly "such a cat like"bucky whispered to him chuckling
Loki nudged him with his free hand and started to write on his note since he can't sign for obvious reasons and his breathing became labored a little
"Hey I got you , you know that , I got you" bucky said quietly loosen his grip and hold his hand instead and kept on patting his hair till his breathing turned to normal "that's it ,you're doing great, I got you"
after finishing Loki gave the note to bucky with shaky hands and closed his eyes "you sleep now , you're seriously tired and i'll be just here like I promised , taking care of you,okay" bucky whispered to him and Loki just nodded a little yawning
what they share is more than just friendship or love call it whatever you want , but what they share is deep, unique and feels just right cause no-one will understand them better than each other and that's the only truth .