Thoughts of a houseplant

"Give yourself... 15 percent." Tony snarked. I rustled my vines in annoyance. That boy was insufferable. At least his thoughts were busy.

I sifted through the top layer of consciousness to get to the serious stuff. I was interrupted by JARVIS, that bugger.

"Sir, you have a call..." Bla bla bla- oh! It's Phil! I like him! Shoot! Stupid Stark is ignoring him. Guess I'll just have to assist him a bit.

"Sir, my protocols are being overridden." JARVIS sounded vaguely amused that Phil was coming up anyway.

The elevator doors opened and everyone's favorite agent stepped out.

"Phil!" Pepper greeted cordially.

"Phil? His first name is Agent." Tony informed Pepper incredulously. I laughed mentally and began sorting through Phil's thoughts. Hmm government secrets, classified plans, nothing new. Sometimes I'd say Phil was a computer because his thoughts are so orderly!

"I don't like being handed things." Tony said, still miffed about the whole 'Phil' thing.

"We'll I LOVE being handed things, so lets trade!" Pepper took the file from Phil and handed him her drink while taking Tony's drink and gave him the file.

"Is this about the Avenger's initiative- which I know nothing about. By the way."

I fed the proper information to JARVIS and as soon as Stark put something into the computer, it popped up just like I wanted. I just have to say, I sped up response time to unbelievable speeds.

Believe it or not, there was some interesting stuff about the tesseract that I hadn't seen before. But, if you ask me, they really should have left well enough alone.

Phil left and I mentally waved goodbye. It gets annoying when no one can see you. seriously, no one ever talk to a houseplant. All the other guys have it easy. They aren't sentient life forms with feelings and unique hacking capabilities. They just get to sit there and look pretty whilst people admire them. They don't usually have to worry about getting Tony Stark to press conferences on time or back to Pepper in time for their dates.

"You have a lot of work to do." Pepper told Stark. I mentally agreed. Even though I am much quicker than him, I still have a lot of research about this crisis.

Oh- some hot young thing stole the tesseract. This should be interesting.

Notes

Okay, I'm off to a slow start. I didn't really know how to start it out, you know, get y'all to know the setting and all. Please do post any and all suggestions in the comments below. I need all the help I can get! :)