Loki x Reader - Give Me Love

After Loki dealt with two more irate guards – of course ‘dealt’ really meant ‘telekinetically threw them against the wall’ – he decided that the trip couldn’t wait until the morning; and the next thing you knew you were on your way to a small airstrip.

When you were led to the car, something in your mind snapped and your stomach churned uncontrollably. You didn’t want to go... You couldn’t... When he had said he would take you away, you thought he was just trying to... to... You didn’t even know! But it was all too real now... He was taking you away from the place you unwillingly called ‘home’, and taking you to – where? You didn’t even know that!

Taking a deep breath, you looked to the darkness through the tinted window of the car as it swerved around large pieces of fallen buildings. The city was completely desolate and silent. Shops had been destroyed and raided before they were abandoned, homes and apartments forgotten, and belongings left behind. Being in the tower and looking down on it all was one thing... but actually being on the streets, seeing the dark patches of blood that sucked in all light that touched it, and the crumpled remains of bodies... it made you sick... The car quickly passed through a tall tower, made of what looked like scraps of metal. You looked over your shoulder. As soon as the car was clear of the makeshift building, a bright blue wall of energy rose from the ground, and once it reached the top of the building it disappeared into the darkness of the city. Was that a force field? You’d seen enough sci-fi shows to know one when you see one... but is that really what you had seen?

You pushed the thought from your mind. What did it matter anyway...? Force-field or not, you weren’t behind the walls of Stark Tower any more... Hesitantly you looked towards Loki before quickly retracting your gaze. Being in the close confines of a car with Loki made breathing nigh-on impossible... In through the nose, out through the mouth... In through the nose, out through the mouth... Just stay calm. Don’t scream. Don’t cry. Just sit, and breathe... Don’t forget to breathe...

“Dove...” Loki called, causing you to jump slightly. You forced yourself to look over to him. “We’re here...” he said, eyeing you for a moment before leaving the back seat of the car. You took a moment to calm your racing heart and followed. You thought you were ready... You thought you were okay... but you weren’t. You were sure that if you stayed around him, you would crumble...

How had you been so strong before? Why could you speak your mind then, but too terrified to even utter a word now?! You harshly bit down on your tongue to stop yourself from screaming and slid out of the car.

Loki took your arm and guided you up a small set of stairs to a large private jet. You swore your jaw hit the floor when you entered the plane... It was far beyond any other aeroplane than you had been on before. Soft golden light filled the cabin. Hints of dark brown wood contrasted the pale creams and deep gold. There were seats for around ten people, four around a shining, wooden dining table, another few were nearer the back with a bar opposite them; and then there was the plush golden couch that Loki took a seat on. It was more than large enough for one person to lie on comfortably, but he didn’t lie down... He was sitting with one knee over the other, and gesturing for you to join him.

“Come on...” Loki said dully. You tensed slightly and took jagged steps towards him. When you reached the couch, you rigidly took your seat, trying to sit as far away as you could without him noticing... but Loki’s arm soon draped around you and pulled you towards his chest. You stopped your need to whimper by biting down hard on your lips. “It’s a long flight my dear...” he pulled you tighter to his chest and forced your head to recline on his shoulder, “You may as well get comfortable.” You looked over the top of the dining table and out the window. Slowly the jet began to move,

“Where are we going?” you murmured. Loki chuckled softly,

“Malibu, my dear... To a wonderfully secluded beach house...” The force from the raised speed of the plane pushed you harder into Loki’s chest. To your surprise, he didn’t seem to mind; but you did... The clean, fresh scent of his skin was both delightful and nauseating, and the touch of his hand sent electricity through your body while also bringing back memories of your time in the cells... How could one person manage to do so many things to you all at once?! You hated the conflicting thoughts, you hated the emotions at war within your heart, you hated that you still felt something other than hatred for Loki!

You tensed slightly as the plane finally lifted into the air. It was one of the irritating parts of flying. The feeling of your stomach moving into your lower intestines before slowly travelled back towards your lungs. You shuddered as the twist in your stomach gradually passed, thankful that you could keep the remaining food in your stomach from coming up. You felt Loki’s fingertips gently trail down your arm, and back up, before going back down... You tightly closed your eyes, and silently hoped Loki wouldn’t grow bored on the travel...

***

There were blurred moments and vague memories of you falling asleep, the plane landing, and being carried down stairs, however, that was where the vague haze ended, because the cool air of the very early morning was like a slap in the face.

Your eyes opened slowly and shifted in Loki’s arms. The plane had landed on a nearly deserted road, you looked to the right; the road tapered off to one side, following the line of a cliff. Your eyes then moved to the sky. It was scarcely lit with pale yellow-orange light. It was probably five in the morning... too early for the sun to make a complete appearance, but light enough to ensure sleep was slightly more than difficult. In the distance, up a gradually inclining hill, were the dim remnants of an illuminated house. You could hear the soft sounds of waves crashing on the rocks, and the gentle sound of birds in calling to one another in the very early morning light. A car sat waiting for you, ready to make the climb through a tree-lined driveway. A shadow covered man opened the door, allowing Loki to place you in the car before slipping in next to you.

The drive up the curving road was fast. Briefly you caught sight of a helicopter pad and what looked like tennis courts... but both disappeared behind concrete retaining walls that kept the largely uneven ground from falling on top of the levelled and dazzling house... The driveway then split off into two different directions, one led to a lower level, probably an underground garage – or something even more extravagant – and the other circled around an unmoving water feature, giving enough room for probably seven or eight large cars to park and still be only a few steps from the front door. The driver stopped directly in front of the door; Loki exited the car and waited for you to follow behind. You did, but you were still too consumed by your surroundings to pay any real attention to what you were doing or where you were going...

Untamed gardens crept up the concrete retaining walls and over their raised beds, you started walking towards one peculiarly beautiful flower, entranced by its colour and seeming luminance in the disappearing moonlight, but before you reached it Loki snagged your arm and lead you into the building. Anxiety began to once again build in your chest as you saw the car drive away. You were really alone with him... If he became irritated, or displeased, he could easily kill you, and no one would ever know, nor would anyone actually care... Your mind froze. Thor... What had happened to him? Loki hadn’t mentioned him much at all... Was he... Was he dead...?

“(Name)...” Loki said. Your eyes snapped up. He still had hold of your hand but was a fair distance in front of you. “Is something wrong?” he stepped closer and ran his fingertips over your cheek.

“I-...” You shook your head. “You’ll get mad...” You almost sounded like a child; your voice too quiet and timid to belong to a(n) (adult/teen). He eyed you curiously for a moment.

“It’s about Thor, isn’t it?” a soft gasp caught in your throat and your eyes widened. His hand moved to your hair. You had half expected him to yank your head downwards roughly... but he didn’t... Instead he allowed his fingers to play gingerly in you (h/c) hair. “I would prefer it if you didn’t mention him while we are here...” his voice was forcibly calm – you could tell he was supressing his other emotions and the dark glint to his eyes only enforced your thoughts.

“Could you just tell me... is he dead?” he remained silent for a moment.

“No; he still rots in that cell, and that is where he will stay until The Avengers fall.” You thought that knowing would put your mind at ease... but it didn’t... In fact it only made you worry more; but before you had a chance to ask anything else, Loki began to lead you through the house. You were too absorbed in your own mind to truly take in anything... You noticed floor to ceiling glass windows facing the ocean... you noticed a futuristic style, considering every wall was ever-so-slightly curved, but you couldn’t retain any of the layout... That is until he led you to the bedroom...

The room was huge, and the wall nearest the beach curved outwards. Two large glass doors stood on either side of the king bed, a small coffee table and seats were off of the foot of the bed, drawers, cupboards and what you presumed to be a walk in robe was placed all around the other walls. Loki walked up to the bed and sat down on the edge of the bed, you slowly walked to a seat near the coffee table, but you didn’t sit down; you were too preoccupied running different scenarios through your mind to take that luxury. Was he intending to have sex with you? Did he actually expect you to spend the night in the same bed with him? Tears sprung to the corners of your eyes. In your mind you knew you should have followed him... But a large part of you couldn’t stand the idea of being in the same bed as him... Hesitantly you looked up. He was looking directly at you, a hint of anger – or was it sadness – in his eyes...

“Dove, come here...” he said, extending his hand. You wanted too... Well... not exactly... Your mind was telling you to move before Loki had a chance to do something; but your body refused to listen. “Dove...” he repeated again. You shook your head,

“I-I can’t...” you mumbled while slowly stumbling backwards. His eyes sharpened.

“Dove...” he stood and stepped forward. You chewed on your inner lip and shook your head. “I thought we were passed this!” he snared as he flicked his wrist, breaking the nearby cupboard. You flinched and clenched your jaw as it cracked and splintered into millions of little pieces before falling to the ground.

“You think I would just forget what you did to me?” when his dark eyes moved back to you, your knees hit the back of a seat, and you fell a top it.

“You said you loved me.” You could tell he wanted to yell... but he was restraining himself...

“I-,” he had you there... You grit your teeth. “I was mad. I was scared. And-,”

“And what?!”

“And I can’t take this... I can’t take living in fear!” you tore your eyes away from him and buried your head in your hands, trying to hide the tears that pricked at your eyes. “I’m so afraid that I will say the wrong thing, that I will do the wrong thing... I’m afraid how you will react... and I’m so sick of it... I’m just so fucking sick of being scared!” Silent sobs wracked your body, but when you heard Loki shift forward, you froze. What was he doing? Where was he going? You should look up... You should really look up... but you just couldn’t....

“I will stay in the room down the hall, until you are ready to have me in your bed again...” Your eyes widened and you found yourself able to look up in stages; first his feet and legs, then his chest... then his face. The dark light in his eyes told you he was still supressing his other emotions, but you could clearly see his sadness and pain. “Does that suit you?” he asked.

“Yes,” you hadn’t realised that you had been holding your breath until you spoke, but after that single word you gulped down air greedily. Loki turned to leave, but stopped in the doorway. Shit... Had he changed his mind? Was he going to force you into the bed? Was-,

“Good night, (Name)...” he muttered softly before leaving you alone in the eerily dark room.

You were trembling... why? He was gone... He was... He was... Silent tears slipped down your cheeks. Why were you crying?! You didn’t even bother trying to wipe away the tears, there were too many for you to ever get under control. You clutched your aching chest. It felt like someone was standing on you, stopping any attempt you made to catch your breath. It was such a familiar feeling... It was guilt... But why would you feel guilty?! He had done nothing but harm you – the pain in your chest suddenly worsened, and an intense bout of nausea ran through you. Was your body trying to argue with you? Your brows furrowed. No. That was stupid. You took a deep breath and slowly made your way over to the bed.

Your steps were numb and sluggish, when you reached the foot of the bed; you fell onto its softness and curled up. The longer you lay atop the bed, the more it started to feel too big, too empty, too cold... But you couldn’t bear the thought of moving at the time... So you curled up tighter on top of the blanket, cuddled a pillow close, and slowly began to drift away...

***

It was like no dream you had ever had before... it was so real, but unknown at the same time... Of course, you knew it was a dream the moment you opened your eyes and saw a bright blue sky filled with white fluffy clouds, and felt the warmth of the sun on your skin. As much as you wanted it to be real... you knew it wasn’t... There was no place left on Earth like this...

“Do you fear me?” a deep voice echoed in your mind. Your brows furrowed.

“Who’s there?” you asked as you sat up.

“Do you hate me?” the voice slowly became clearer and more familiar.

“What?”

“Would you still recoil at my touch?” a cold shudder ran down your spine as the voice finally came into focus.

“L-Loki...?” you squeaked.

Suddenly you felt the grassy ground shift underneath you and morph into the secure warmth of another person. A gasp caught in your throat as strong arms wrapped around you.

“W-What is this?” You struggled against the near suffocating grip,

“I should ask you the same thing... No matter how I tried, I could never enter your dreams before... but now, something has changed. What is it?” Loki whispered into your ear before tenderly running his lips over your neck.

“I... I...” Just when you capable of real speech, the dream slipped away...

***

Your eyes cracked open. You vaguely noticed the blankets and pillows thrown around and off of the bed, as well as the grey light filtering in through the windows, but sleep quickly found you once more; you were too exhausted and confused to linger on anything for any longer than necessary...

When you woke up the second time, you immediately noticed your limbs were stiff, and your head ached terribly. You rubbed your forehead and tried to remember what the cause would have been... but the last thing you remembered was Loki leaving you alone... No dream, no nightmare... and no memory of even getting into bed! You sighed and rolled onto your side, felling hesitant to leave the bedroom, the confusion of the whole situation still lingering in your mind. However, soon the alluring smell of frying bacon, eggs and toast eventually reached you, and drew you from the room.

Your room was at the end of a long, dark hallway – though you guessed it was only dark because all the doors along the way were closed. After a few failed attempts at opening locked doors, you swiftly moved down the hallway and towards the only source of light you could actually see.

The hallway opened up to a light filled lounge room and dining room, which were separated by a dividing wall. A few stylish lounges sat in the lounge room and you saw the possibility for the large glass walls to open onto a thin verandah. The concrete dividing wall had a fire place in the middle, acting like a small window between the two rooms. Vaguely you saw the legs of a glass and metal table, and the browning fronds of a pot plant, but you were moving too quickly through the two rooms to notice anything else. The search for the cook making breakfast had consumed your mind. Maybe it would be a maid... or someone else who could save you from the solitude of - - You swore your jaw nearly hit the floor when your eyed found the kitchen...

Loki was... Loki was cooking. Since when does the almighty and pompous Loki do anything for himself? The maids would bring to food for him in the tower... Your brows furrowed, you two were really alone in the house... No maids, no servants... no one except for the two of you... He must have noticed you staring, because he turned to you with a raised eyebrow.

“What?” Your eyes widened and you shook your head.

“N-Nothing...” The raven haired man gestured to the small dining table in front of the kitchen,

“Take a seat.” He said before bringing two plates to the table.

Nervously you sat down and picked at the plate of food. To your surprise, it was actually edible, and certainly didn’t taste like it was poisoned... or drugged... As nervous as you felt, you couldn’t help the small smirk that began creeping onto your face; the thought of Loki cooking and cleaning, all while wearing a frilly pink apron was the only thing that stuck in your mind.

“Do you find something amusing?” he asked suddenly.

“I-I... uh...” his eyes locked with your own.

“Spit it out...” he said dully while sipping on coffee.

“I just never really thought of you doing house work... It just...” you shrugged with a small chuckle, “It seems kind of oddly cute...” You froze. Did you just call Loki cute? Your eyes refocused on the raven haired man. An amused smirk pulled at his lips.

“I’m glad I could be entertaining for you... However, if you want a real show, then perhaps you should stick around and help with the dishes...” he said with a playful smile. A reluctant smile pulled at your lips and you laughed quietly. “Tell me my dear, after you’re finished, would you care to take a walk with me?” he asked with curiosity in his eyes.

“Where too?” you asked warily.

“Along the beach.” He answered, gesturing to the large window to your left.

The sky was a pale grey, there were a few darker clouds, and some lighter clouds, but the overwhelming greyness was inescapable. The water mimicked the sky, and looked completely unsettled; waves crashed on themselves and onto the rocks that rose out of the water.

“It looks a little glum...” you mumbled to yourself.

“Then we can spend the day inside...” Loki said colourlessly.

“No.” you said sharply while quickly turning back to him. “C-Could we go now? It looks like it’s going to rain...” you asked slower, trying to make up for your brashness only moments ago. Loki nodded while standing, and walked towards what looked to be an elevator. You followed behind, ensuring you stayed at an arm’s length, just to be safe.

***

When you entered the elevator, you came to learn that the house had three levels. One above the floor you were on and another directly below... but they weren’t where you were going. Loki pressed the large “BF” button and the elevator began to move.

When the elevator came to a stop and the doors opened, you were immediately assaulted with the strong scent of the water and the gusting wind coming from over the sea. It blew your (h/c) hair around your face, and very nearly managed to push the hem of your dress over your head. Fighting against the flailing green fabric, you looked around.

Concrete columns from the house reached all the way down to the sand, your eyes drifted upwards; the house hung over the cliff slightly, and you noted that if one of the columns gave way, you would definitely be squished. Putting that ‘delightful’ thought away, your eyes moved to the scenery in front of you. To your right was a high and far reaching cliff, and to your right, a small private beach filled with small trees, lots of sand, and a few fallen boulders from the cliffs above. Loki gently wrapped his arm around your waist and pulled you along the pale yellow sand and towards the edge of the water.

The sand was warmer than you thought it would be, and sent a pleasant tingle through your legs. You both moved further down towards the water, every once and a while the waves would reach your feet, it too was warmer than you thought. Cautiously you stepped further away from Loki, and stepped into the lukewarm water. You could have quite happily fallen into the open arms of the ocean and just let the waves wash over you... You closed your eyes and imagined the weightlessness of floating in the water. You were so wound up in your own daydream that you stopped watching where you were walking, and something incredibly hard suddenly hit the tips of your toes,

“Mother fu-,” you groaned and gritted your teeth through the pain while trying to steady your one legged hopping; however it did little good because you fell directly onto your arse. Loki turned and looked at you before he bent down and picked up what looked like a rock. You supressed the need to glare at him and instead focused on rubbing your still throbbing foot,

“I thought the seashells of Midgard were regarded as beautiful...” Loki said as he took a step closer to you. You looked up. A faint glimmer of shining silver passed through his fingers. You smiled and shook your head.

“It is...” you said. Loki’s brows furrowed and he looked at you as if you were crazy. You sighed and pulled the shell from his hand before turning it around and handing it back. “It’s some type of clam shell... or something... You know the ones that make pearls?”

“Don’t think me to be a fool...” he said as he took a seat next to you. Loki then took your hand, placed the shell back in your hand before covering it with his other. “Pearls are a rare and expensive commodity, even on Asgard...” he pulled his hand away and when he did, a three layered beaded necklace of pearls hung from his fingers, the separate rows linking together with a large crystal flower. “They say that pearls are the queens of the gems... and the gem of queens...” He mused while gently lowering the necklace back into the clam shell.

You kept your eyes fixed on the pearls too sure that if you looked at him your heart would stop completely. But Loki had other ideas. His hand found your chin and forced you to look directly into his eyes. He gave you a moment to steady your breathing before he spoke again.

“I intend to kiss you...” your mouth fell open slightly, but before you could voice your uncertainty, Loki leaned forward and pressed his lips to your own. At first you intended to pull away... but... it wasn’t like most of the kisses you had been forced to endure. It was soft... sweet... and incredibly short. In fact, Loki pulled away before you had a chance to. He gently ran his thumb over your lips before he retracted his hand. “Shall we continue our walk, or would you prefer to sit here a while longer?” he asked while pulling you closer. You took a few steadying breaths,

“S-Sit... a little while longer...” Loki smiled,

“Good choice...” he whispered while making himself a little more comfortable next to you.

***

Minutes – or was it hours – of silence passed. You scolded yourself. No, definitely not hours... it was still too light for that much time to have passed. Either way it didn’t matter; regardless of the time you still spent the entire time either staring at the pearls, or closely examining the creases and folds of Loki’s silky shirt.

“Who was it?” he said suddenly,

“Wh-What?” you asked.

“You said you knew what it was like to have someone betray you...” Loki trailed off, leaving you a chance to answer his question. ‘Get out! He doesn’t want you here!’ the screaming words of a by-gone time echoed through your head. You took a deep breath,

“It wasn’t really a betrayal... it could almost be seen as justified hatred...” you muttered under your breath.

“What?” Loki asked. You shook your head and stood up wanting to continue walking,

“It’s nothing...” Swiftly Loki stood, placed his hand on your shoulder and stopped you from taking another step.

“Tell me.” He said with authority in his tone. A muddle of indescribable emotions churned in your stomach, but the first one you recognised was irritation – so you went with that, ignoring any protest the other emotions made.

“Do you actually care? Or is this just another way to torment me?!” You shoved his hand away, “I can’t believe I actually let you get to me again!” You yelled before starting back to the house.

The whole walk back you didn’t even bother looking over your shoulder, both out of fear and aggravation. That didn’t mean you couldn’t feel Loki’s eyes on your back. About half way back you realised that you must have dropped the shell... A sigh passed through your lips. You wanted to go back and pick it up... but you couldn’t bear the thought of facing him... Wanting to calm yourself, you ran a hand through your hair before continuing to walk... You pressed the button and half expected Loki to be behind you... but he wasn’t... You sighed to yourself and entered the elevator.

When you reached the lounge room, you mouth very nearly fell open. Loki was sitting, quite calmly, on the couch.

“Now Dove, you shouldn’t run off like that.” He said as he glanced up to you. “You’re supposed to be resting; walking back in such an irritable state will put unnecessary strain on you.” The sharpness in his voice made the bitterness return to your blood,

“I’m fi-,” you paused. “Actually...” you started. “I’m a little tired...” you trailed off, not sure if you should ask permission to return to your room, or just leave...

“Well go on then...” Loki almost growled. You nodded and quickly trotted off to your room.

You didn’t bother leaving your room for dinner, and Loki didn’t bother calling for you... So you just laid down, sprawled out on the bed, until nearly midnight when sleep unwillingly found you.

***

You were sprinting down the hallways, a million thoughts a second running through your head; but the most predominant was ‘Please, don’t be dead... please, don’t be dead...!’ You rounded the corner and nearly managed to trip over an empty stretcher.

“Sorry!” You said to the nurse pushing the bed as you continued on your path. However, when you reached a fork in the road, you paused. “3-B... 3-B...” You looked at the numbers on the doors, and decided right was the way to go...

About halfway down the hallway you came to a halt.

“What are you doing here?” a familiar voice called. It was his fiancée, Edith...

“I-I just...” the hate filled glare coming from the elderly woman stopped you mid-sentence.

“You don’t contact him in over three years, and you show up now?” she spat, venom lacing her words. Your mouth fell open, and for a moment strength returned to your body.

“I didn’t call in all that time because the last time we spoke he did nothing but yell and scream at me! Or did you forget that he said he wanted nothing to do with me?!”

“Then why are you here?! Get out! He doesn’t want you here!” she screamed. It was like a knife to the chest. You tried to sort out your thoughts into a coherent sentence, but before you had a chance a security guard stepped in.

“Is everything alright Ma’am?” he asked Edith. She turned to the tall man,

“My husband is trying to rest, would you please escort her out?” she said, gesturing to you. Wait... when did they get married? The tall man turned to you, and placed his hand on your back, readying to lead you away.

“N-No, wait! I’m his granddaughter!” you said as you fought against the security guards hold. He paused and turned back towards Edith, searching for an answer.

“Look on his next of kin list... She won’t be there... He has no granddaughter.”

***

You shot up in bed, gasping for air with cold sweat covering your body. You were too numb to feel anything, except for maybe the hatred for your own self-pity... You detested this feeling, but you couldn’t do anything to stop it, not once the feelings started snowballing... Slowly you slid out of bed – pulling the duvet with you – walked into the large living room, and huddled yourself on the hanging white egg chair directly in front of the window. Loki woke up some time after you. Instead of trying to force you out of the house or into any other situation, he sat down with a book and read silently...

You spent the entire day just staring out at the waves as they broke on the rocky shore below... Every once and a while you sensed Loki’s eyes move to you, but he didn’t say anything... When you felt his eyes on you, a nervous lump formed in your throat, and you found you lungs incapable of taking in air. But it would always pass... It was almost like he was checking you were still alive...

*Loki’s POV*

Damn her... Damn this... Damn everything! Loki could only focus on the thick book for a little while before he felt the need to look at her once more. What had he done wrong yesterday?! He pulled back his own emotions... He pulled back his need to reprimand her! So why did she still pull away?! Why does she still distance herself?! Loki clenched his jaw as his nails dug into the slick cover of the book. ‘She needs more time; stop being so impatient’ A voice – that sounded strangely like Thor's – echoed through his head. Loki reasoned it was his conscious. Ironic that his voice was the one he thought of when he didn’t know what to do... He took a deep breath to steady himself. ‘Ask her for forgiveness...’ He didn’t need to ask for forgiveness. (Name) already had - - Loki’s mind stopped. Had she forgiven him? He had just assumed that she had... His emerald eyes lifted to her once more; and immediately he felt like an utter fool... but he wouldn’t admit it... He could never admit it... Nor would his pride allow him to grovel at the feet of a mortal... Not while she showed no sign of letting him in...

*Your POV*

By the time the afternoon sun broke through the clouds, you had had enough... He was so God damn confusing. All the mixed signals, and conflicting reactions... Thor had told you of Loki’s anger towards him and his father... He had told you of the hatred he felt for everyone and everything on Earth... but he had not told you why... You had to know why, you had to have him tell you why.

“Why...” you started, but your voice caught in your throat, stopping you from finishing,

“Why what?” You took a deep breath.

“Y-You said you didn’t want me to bring him up... But I have to know... Why do you hate your brother so much?” you asked as your eyes moved to the raven haired man. You saw him visibly stiffen, and his eyes glaze over slightly. He slammed his book shut and placed it on the lounge next to him.

“Why? Why do you ‘need’ to know?” he growled.

“Because I have to know there was a real reason... A real reason for everything you’ve done.” Loki’s eyes scanned you for a moment before he began speaking.

“I will tell you, if you tell me your story...” your lips pursed, but you nodded. Loki took a deep breath, clearly irritated you had agreed to his deal. “I grew up in a shadow... No matter what I did, no matter how hard I tried, I was never good enough.” He chuckled bitterly, “and I only learnt a short time ago that it was never truly my fault; that even though I was better than Thor in every way, my so-called ‘father’ would have never chosen me over that dull brute...” Loki trailed off, growing more and more irate with each passing word.

“Why?” you asked, barely above a whisper. His intense gaze met your own,

“Because I wasn’t his. To him I was nothing more than the spoils of war...” he snarled darkly. Your brows furrowed. Spoils of war? During your time with Thor, he had told you Loki was adopted, but he had not mentioned a War... “It was over nine hundred years ago,” Loki started, sensing your confusion, “Odin and his army fought against the Frost Giants of Jotunheim... At the end of the battle Odin took me, and for my entire life lied about my true parentage... while also dangling the throne of Asgard over my head, something I now know I could never have...” a small smirk pulled at his lips, “Unless of course I took it by force...”

“So the only reason you’re here is to spite your father?” he didn’t respond. “Millions of people have died Loki!”

“Did you weep for the hundreds of thousands of people who died every day before I arrived? Or is death different when you can put a face to it?”

“It’s different when one person causes it all... Do you not feel any guilt?”

“Should I?” he asked. “Had they done what I asked, no one would have died. It is their own fault for trying to stand up to a God.” Your jaw clenched. Was he really so heartless?!

“If you don’t feel anything... then why does this matter so much to you?! I still don’t understand why you have to prove yourself to your father!”

“He is not my father, and I no longer care what he thinks of me,”

“You do care Loki! He may not be your biological father, but he was the one who raised you! He was the one who loved you! You cannot tell me it means nothing!” Loki opened his mouth to reply, but you cut him off. “I know it hurts when someone like that throws you away Loki! I know exactly how it hurts!” Loki lowered his gaze. He was hurting... you knew what he told you had barely scratched the surface of his life, and for him to react so violently, the wounds were still fresh – perhaps too fresh to be prodding... You tucked a few stray strands of hair behind your ear. You wanted to hate him... You should hate him... but you couldn’t manage to close your heart off...

Slowly you felt the tension in the room dissipate into an all too familiar silence.

“Dove...” Loki started, “Would you sing for me?”

“M-My throat hurts...” you lied, thinking it would probably be better than just flatly saying no. His emerald eyes lingered on you for a moment before returning to the book.

“Well how about just music? I’ve grown sick of listening to the wall clock ticking...” he gestured to a large touch screen tablet mounted in the wall without looking up. You stood and made your way over to the tablet. The device turned-on on its own, so you flicked lazily through the songs, hoping one would eventually peak your interest.

It seemed like every song ever written was listed... You moved through the list faster until one song caught your eye. A small smile pulled at your lips. You may not have liked the movie that brought it to everyone’s attention, but you absolutely loved the almost nonsensical lyrics and the slow, peaceful melody... You pressed the play button on the touch screen and turned around to face Loki. He was still refusing to look at you. You slowly stepped forward as the lyrics to the song began to play.

‘I was a quick, wet boy,

Diving too deep for coins,

All of your street light eyes,

Wide on my plastic toys,

And when the cops closed the fair,

I cut my long baby hair,

Stole me a dog-eared map,

And called for you everywhere...’

When you reached Loki, you gently reached out and took hold of his hands. To say you were nervous would have been an understatement – and the fact that you definitely weren’t much of a dancer didn’t help at all – but you felt a need to be close to him, to touch him, and have him hold you.

The raven haired prince was reluctant to stand to begin with, but as you started to sway and rock back and forth, he decided to stand and join you. Almost immediately you moved closer to him and wrapped your arms around his chest while continuing to sway. You hummed along with the gentle melody and closed your eyes.

“I am sorry (Name)...” Loki murmured softly. Your eyes widened. You couldn’t believe he actually said it... Softly you nuzzled into his chest and nodded,

“I know...” your throat was so dry that it caused your voice to crackle. Loki’s hands moved to your shoulders and carefully pulled you away,

“Please, say that you forgive me...” Suddenly your chest tightened and any thought that you had in your head escaped your grasp. How could he ask for such a thing? A better question: Could you grant it to him? Loki’s hand ran through your hair. “You don’t have too...but...” he trailed off as he gently cupped your cheek with a sigh. He took a moment to recollect himself. “All I ask for is your love (Name),” your eyes widened, “love me (Name), and I will give you the world...” he said with a sad smile. You could feel the tears slowly slipping down your cheeks, and while your mind may have started working again, your voice still remained silent. You didn’t want the world... You wanted him, like this. You wanted him kind, soft... You wanted him to hold you close and not constantly fear retaliation... nothing more, nothing less... Slowly your hands moved to cover his, removing them from your cheeks,

“I don’t think I’ll ever be able to forgive you for what you did...” The shock and pain in his eyes made you look away. “I don’t think I will ever be able to overlook it either... but... Maybe...” You took a deep breath, “Maybe I – maybe we – could somehow find a way through it all...” you whispered.

“I will take whatever you are willing to give me...” Loki wrapped his arms around you and started to sway once more.

There was still something in the back of your mind that told you to stay alert. This wasn’t the first time he’d been kind, and if history were to repeat, then his bad side would come back with a vengeance soon... Because, really, what was he? He was your captor, your ruler, your master, your saviour, your tormentor.... and now? Just what was he to you now? He was still too distant and cold for a lover, but too gentle and kind for a Master... Just what was he to you...?!

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