Monster

I know I said it a lot, but I really hated waitressing. When I took up a waitressing job in high school to pay for my prom dress, I threw a party when I could finally afford to quit. My parents, of course, thought of this as a major adolescent failure and reminded me of it when I decided to join the army. Because I had apparently never stuck with anything and the military was going to be a lot harder than waitressing. Their lack of faith in me motivated me to get through basic training. And then proving them right all along just seemed to play a large role in my depression. According to my therapist.

By the time lunch-hour started I already had a raging headache and my feet hurt and my back hurt and I wanted to go home. The only good thing about the job was that it kept my mind off of Bucky and the fact that HYDRA had marked me as a threat.

When the lunch hour rush was over I took a break and sat down in a storage room in the back on a couple of old crates. I leaned against my knees and rubbed the ache from my forehead. The only good thing about this job was that I wasn’t entirely unemployed. But the thought of going to work for Stark in a nice comfortably air conditioned office, seemed more appealing at that moment than it had before.

I heard the door swing open and Megan/Morgan popped her head in. I always forgot what her name was but she never bothered to correct me if I was wrong. I knew I got it wrong because I’d called her by both names more than once and she never said anything about either of them.

“Hey, I know you’re on a break,” she said. “But a creepy guy just came in and asked for you. I seated him in booth four where you always stick your guests.” I nodded and stood up.

“Yeah, alright. Okay,” I replied.

She held the door open for me and followed me back out to the dining area. I stopped short when I stepped into the room. The “creepy guy” was sitting in the booth with his back to the wall and his hood and cap over his eyes. But I recognized his gloved hands and shadowy figure.

“Is everything okay?” Morgan/Megan asked. “Do you want me to kick him out?”

“No, he’s fine. He’s a friend. Get him the biscuits and gravy, extra gravy. And some… milk or something. I’ll pay for the meal. Just let me talk to him.”

“Oh okay. I’ll get it ordered for you.”

“Thank you.”

I came out from behind the bar and his darkened eyes met mine. He had his hands up to block out his face, just in case anyone recognized him. But he was probably drawing more attention to himself just for being such a shady figure. I sat down in the booth across from him.

“The hood is very conspicuous, Bucky. You might want to take it off,” I whispered. He lifted his hand and slid it back off of his head.

“I didn’t want you to know that I haven’t brushed my hair,” he replied. I smiled and reached across the table for his hands.

“I’ve missed you.” He gave me a look of surprise, probably both at my words and the way I’d grabbed his hands.

“I haven’t been gone that long.”

“Two weeks. I didn’t think I’d see you again.”

“I had to come back. They tried to kill you.” I squeezed his hands.

“They didn’t try to kill me. They were just sending a message. You probably shouldn’t even be here. Someone might recognize you.”

“I didn’t know where else to go.”

“You’re not in any trouble, are you?”

“No, I’m…” He stopped.

“You’re hungry,” I finished for him. He kept his eyes on mine and that was all I needed to answer the question. “It’s okay. I’m having someone bring you something. And I’m sorry for interrupting you and Steve the other night. You deserved to talk to him alone.”

“The conversation was over anyway.” I looked over his face again. He had dark circles under his eyes and his beard was growing back in. It didn’t look like he’d showered or slept in weeks.

“You should come home.”

“I don’t want to be a problem for you and Steve.”

Then I thought about what Steve had said. If Bucky had mistakenly developed feelings for me because I was the only one to show him kindness. I wondered if he thought those feelings were going to cause problems for me and Steve. I wanted him to know it was all a sham. But I didn’t want him to think that was an invitation either. He needed to work on himself.

“It hurts us more when you’re not with us. Do you understand? There’s absolutely nothing you need to be afraid of.” I gave his hand a squeeze for emphasis. “Nothing.” He nodded slowly.

“I came back because I don’t want them to kill you,” he told me.

“When was the last time you ate? And I mean a real meal. Not scraps.”

“When I was with you.”

“Good. We’re bringing you biscuits and gravy. It’s a breakfast food but we serve it all day and I thought you might like it. I don’t know what kind of food you like.”

“I like pizza.” I laughed.

“Everyone likes pizza. Are you going to come home?”

“I shouldn’t even have come here. Someone might see me.”

“Please, Bucky? We’ll finish your meal and then I’ll clock out early. You won’t be hurting either of us. Trust me. We want you there.” His eyes traveled over my face before he focused on the table. I took a deep breath and decided to give him at least a little reassurance. Even if I couldn’t tell him everything. “And… Steve and I… care about each other. But we’re not… it’s not…” His eyes lifted to mine again. “It’s not serious. If that’s… that’s something that you’re worried about.”

“I…”

“Biscuits and gravy for the bearded gentleman,” Morgan/Megan said as she approached our table and smiled. I released Bucky’s hands and returned them to my lap. She sat the plate down in front of him. I wanted to ask her why she had hurried so fast to get his meal out to us. Normally it took at least ten minutes even though everything had been prepped that morning and the meal just needed to be heated. She was always in a rush to get French fries to Sam too. “Enjoy your meal,” she said as she gave me a wink and walked off to help another customer.

Bucky examined the plate before lifting his eyes and watching her go.

“She works for someone. She’s a spy. She’s watching you,” he whispered. My eyes went wide.

“What? How can you tell?” I asked him.

“She only ever works when you’re working. Even if they’re short staffed. She’s the only waitress on the floor who checks her phone regularly and she seems to take her orders from the phone and not your manager. Plus she spends more time watching you than she does doing her job.” It was the most I’d ever heard him speak all at once and I blinked a few times before turning around and to watch her help customers.

And then I really watched her. He was right. I could see the bulge of her phone in her apron pocket even though we weren’t allowed to have our phones on us. She was wearing shoes that didn’t fit the job. They probably cut into her heels. She was always there when I was, even when I came in early or on my days off. I always just thought she worked a lot. But then the truth smacked me in the face. She was watching me. I didn’t recognize her. I turned back to Bucky. He hadn’t touched any of his food or the milk she’d sat down next to the plate.

“Steve said it’s likely that the government is keeping tabs on me. I guess I wasn’t paying enough attention,” I replied. “I don’t think she’d poison you though. I can try it first if you want.” His eyes cut to mine and they seemed tense and uncomfortable. I reached over and took his fork, then I cut myself a piece of biscuit and popped it into my mouth. He watched me chew and waited for me to swallow.

“See? No poison,” I replied.

“I wasn’t worried about it.”

“Eat.” I handed the fork back and he took it but didn’t make another move to eat. I sighed. “Fine, do you want to go someplace else?”

“They’re all over the place.”

“Do you want me to make you something at home?” He didn’t answer so I took the fork from him and placed it on the table. “I’ll be right back. Just let me check out.”

I stood up and went around to the back so I could remove my apron and check out early. I didn’t care that I had a shift to follow. My manager never yelled at me because she was scared of me. Morgan or Megan hurried into the back to follow after me. I took my apron off and turned around to face her.

“HYDRA or government?” I asked her. She looked startled.

“What?”

“Answer my question. HYDRA or government? Did you poison my friend?”

“Why would I poison your friend?” I rolled my eyes.

“You’re not a waitress. I should have seen it before. You’re good at it, which means you’ve done this before. But this isn’t your natural element. Either you work for the terrorists who blew up my car yesterday. Or you work for the government. I want to know if you poisoned my friend because the only one who is going to get sick is me and I’d like to know now so I can drive to the hospital and have my stomach pumped.” She crossed her arms and gave me a look of disbelief.

“Talbot just wants me to make sure you’re not leaking messages to HYDRA,” she said. “Don’t get your panties in a twist. I didn’t poison you.”

“Talbot? Why would Talbot have you tail me? I thought he trusted me.”

“He does trust you. That’s why you only have me. But I know that you’ve been sneaking conversations with Sam Wilson and that Captain America spends the night at your house a lot. I didn’t know about Barnes but it might be smart for you to tell me now.” I put my hand on my hip and looked around at the boxes of fresh fruits.

“He doesn’t work for HYDRA anymore,” I told her.

“Are you sure about that? He’s dangerous, Jo.” I nodded.

“He doesn’t. That’s why we’re working with him. Tell Talbot to either stay out of it, or do me the favor and don’t tell him you’ve seen Barnes at all. Trust me on this. This can save everyone. Barnes isn’t dangerous. HYDRA had him by a leash. The leash is broken and he wants to fix what they’ve done to him. I can’t help him, and everyone else, if Talbot ruins it.” She sighed heavily and crossed her arms.

“I won’t tell him if you think this is best. You’re Talbot’s most trusted officer. This was just a precaution. But if that man kills anyone, I’m serving your ass to Talbot on a gold platter.”

“Thank you, Morgan,” I said heading passed her.

“It’s Marion, Jesus Christ,” she replied.

Notes