The silver's tears

They stayed there, none of them wanted to leave waiting the moment he opens his eyes, Natasha spent the time playing with his hair it was the only girly thing she loves, and since only Thor and Loki are the ones with long hair she chose Loki, it will be awkward if she did this with Thor but Loki is different with him she feels normal, spontaneous ,he is like a child the only thing she can’t have one day, with him feels like she has a chance to try this, play tried to play the tough one all these days watching him doubting him but it didn’t last for long, the night he woke up screaming she heard him first, he was crying like a child, she felt his fear she fought an urge to go to him, she wanted to go to Thor and shout at him how he leaves his brother alone but she saw Tony standing in front of his room talking with Thor, she knew how it’s hard for both of them, one makes him remember his past and the other reminding him of his failure, what Thor doesn’t know is that Loki wakes up every night crying silently since the day he came out from the coma, how she knows? Well, she used to stay late at night watching the sky from the balcony and her room is next to his, she isn’t heavy sleeper like Thor, no she heard everything happening in his room and sometimes... Sometimes she spends the night beside him calming him to sleep, she needed someone to make her feel needed and he needed someone by his side even if he can’t say that or feel it
This was her little secret, a secret that part of it was exposed that day, but she doesn’t care anymore, seeing him like this made her weak in front of her feeling can’t fight it this time, she looked at Thor smiling he fell asleep holding Loki’s hand she was glad that he understood her, like Clint who grabbed a chair sitting next to her, he didn’t speak to her just sitting there making sure she is alright bringing her water and favourite juice when he feels that she might be thirsty
Steve still angry with Tony and Bruce, it only made Tony nervous drinking more than usual despite all Bruce tries to stop him but he kept muttering some words swearing till Steve gave up saying he isn’t angry with them anymore after taking their word they won’t do anything like this again
Hours passed and Loki didn’t wake up yet, they fell asleep in their places tired from waiting.
Loki’s body trembled for seconds moaning weakly, he might be here but his mind was in somewhere else far away in a place he once called home
He was running with horror crafted on his face, he kept running from an enemy he can’t see, pegging Heimdal to bring him home, minutes passed like ages till he was brought back to Asgard, he stood in front of him breathing heavily
“you shouldn’t be here, why you came back?” Heimdal asked quietly
“But...this is my home” Loki muttered
“Asgard is no home for frost giants, leave before the people found out your real heritage you won’t be only a traitor but an enemy as well”
“How dare you talk low with me, son of Odin and prince of Asgard” Loki parked
“Stop fooling yourself, Laufeyson...you are not more than a filthy runt so shut up” his voice changed into another one...one so cold..so familiar, it was him again
“Surprised?... I told you I control your life, your world....in short, I control everything”
“What did you do to him?” Loki shouted
“Killed him like I did to everybody else, your mother, father, brother, everyone is dead, can’t you see?” He laughed showing him his home or what left of it...everything was on fire blood everywhere and dead bodies, Loki walked looking around him in horror death everywhere, he prayed not to see certain faces, but he did...he saw his brother body covered with blood he ran crushing beside him, he was still alive
“Thor, don’t leave me please” he cried holding him
“You let...this happen...you are the reason...we are dead because of ...you” he gasped then his body calmed in his arms, he is dead...
“I didn’t do this....I failed” Loki whispered jerking back looking around in disbelief
“This is your future I’ll always control you my toy” he whispered to him coldly and Loki felt himself falling in endless darkness again
He woke up screaming causing all of them to wake up jumping to their feet, he looked around in fear jerking back from whoever was holding him falling to the ground burying his face between his legs shaking forth and forward
Thor sat next to him carefully waiting for him to calm down while the others stood worried about him especially Natasha who was still shaking from his scream seeing him jerking away from her
“Loki” Thor called him gently patting him, he just flinches moving away
“Look around you brother, you are safe here,” Thor said holding his hand tightly
Loki looked at him for a second before he looked away closing his eyes remembering what he just saw, Thor’s face covered with blood...
“Look at me” Thor pleaded turning his face to face him again
“Leave me,” he said weakly holding his tears
“Never,” Thor said holding him
“Why?” he cried
“Because you are my brother and I’ll never let you go”
“everyone...dead..” Loki said closing his eyes tightly
“it was just a nightmare, nothing happened we are all safe, you are safe” Thor said holding him
“This voice....Can you make him s...stop..please, Th...Thor” Loki said weakly like he found it difficult to speak
“We will fight him together don’t worry brother,” Thor said looking at his friends surrounding them
“No...You can’t fight him ....He is strong” he cried
“So are we,” Steve said
Loki continued as if he isn’t aware of them “Just...Make him let me go, I’m...I’m dead already” He said in a weak voice Thor barely could hear him
“Shut up” Thor shouted at him can’t believe that this is his brother talking
“You...You enjoy seeing me like this?” Loki cried
“Why should I be you fool?” Thor said shocked
“Then help me...” Loki yelled in a husky voice
“I will but not in this way”
“What does he want?” Bruce asked
“This fool wants me to help him kill himself” Thor cried looking away hiding his tears
“Did he lost his damn mind?” Tony exclaimed
“No, he lost hope,” Steve said sadly
“They can’t protect you from me, You know this very well don’t you? And you know how to end this” The voice whispered to him
“Then kill me already” Loki cried in pain
“What?” Thor asked in shock
“You know I want you to d it, it is more fun you know” he laughed
“Fun” Loki whispered gazing at the void
“Who is he talking to? Did he lost it or what?” Clint said gasping, looking at Natasha who was holding his hand nervously
“Listen to me, you stop this talking right now or I’ll punch you I swear to God”
“Thor calm down for god sake enough madness” Steve shouted
“How exactly are you going to fight what you can’t see?” Loki yelled pushing Thor weakly
"Then hurt yourself instead" Thor parked "Loki this is madness let us help you, together we can stop him”
"You can't no one can" Loki screamed enraged, they didn’t see what he saw and he won’t let any one suffer the way he did even if this caused him his life
Loki tried to stand up, he leaned against the chair pushing himself to stand, he felt pain in every bone of his body, he soon falls to the ground he was desperate and angry but the only thing he did is to cry as it won't cause him pain
"He took everything from me …everything" Loki said enraged trying to wipe away his tears
“And still not enough, this became boring how about another game” the voice whispered to him
“What I ever did to you?” Loki cried hiding his face
“Is he here? Thor shouted at Loki who nodded silently
“I feel cold Thor” Loki said weakly feeling the voice control him again playing with his mind “lets start from the beginning my toy"
Thor grabbed his cape covering him with it holding him in his arms with tears gathering in his eyes, Thor can feel his heart beats falls again, his body became colder and paler
"Hey stay with me, stay," Thor said holding him slapping him gently on the face to keep him awake
"I’m...I’m tired of fighting Thor I just want to rest is this much to ask” he said sobbing
"shhh , it's alright , everything will be okay I promise you " Thor said hugging him, Loki gasped trying to take his breath but he couldn't the pain was killing him all he can see is blur, he felt this terrible headache and everything went black, he can feel being dragged to the cold and darkness again .
"Hey stay with me, stay with me, don't you dare do it again, no, Loki " Thor cried shaking him, banner pushed Thor away checking on Loki
"He passed out couldn't endure the pain " banner said sighing
Thor held Loki back to his room and banner went with him
"Earth mightiest heroes stood like bunch of cowards useless, fuck," Tony said enraged breaking the glass he holds
"You are angry we all feel the same, but there is nothing we could have done to stop him," Steve said
"He is right this son of a bitch wasn't even here, "Clint said
"Look at the bright side Loki came back," Natasha said smiling a little
"If he wakes up again," Thor said frustrated crushing on the sofa
"Don't lose hope Thor, this time is different he will wake up it is just the pain was unbearable for him he needs only some rest " banner said
"I know but seeing him suffering like this, god he is just a kid, he doesn't deserve all of this"
"Kid?" Clint asked "Thor get some sleep buddy" he smirked
"He is only 20 years old you know, "banner said quietly "according to our calculation here of course"
"Shut the hell up 20 you kidding right," Clint said with eyes wide opened
"But he looks older and his attitudes also, " Steve said confused
"Being in a living hell for more than two years change any one or even broke them " Thor said in a weak voice "you know Loki was never treated as the youngest one among us and even him didn't like this always trying to do everything with us so no one calls him a child until he himself forgets that he still a kid"
"Because he isn't Thor, he is a warrior, very strong one too" banner said quietly

Notes